Family Ties
by EmilliJayne
Summary: A surprise visitor for our favourite Triple Treble girls. Rated M for a reason, Trigger Warning. Mild abuse and self harm, slight starvation. if these trigger you then don't read.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: So this has been swimming around in my head for a while now but I wanted to get my other story finished and out of the way first :) I thought I might try a triple treble this time, just to have a go. This one is M rated and may have triggers in for some people. Don't read if you are of a sensitive disposition, I don't want to hurt anyone by bringing up bad memories or flashbacks or anything like that.**

 **Chapter 1**

She just laid there, leaning against the front door of Apartment 4D. She'd knocked a few times but nobody had answered so she assumed they weren't in (they were college students after all). She brought her knees up to her chest, making herself as small as possible so as not to be noticed by any strange people passing by. Really not in the mood for their judging looks and pitiful questions, she'd had enough of that on the 2 day bus ride over. She lost track of how long she'd been sitting there, but it must have been a while because she was woken up by someone approaching. She could faintly hear them talking but there were no responses, they must be on the phone. She kept her eyes closed as the person stopped in front of her, whispering into her cell phone.

"Yes I'm sure it's her. I know what your sister looks like Aubrey. You might want to get home as soon as you can. She looks pretty bad... Yeah, she was just laying there... she's curled up against the door asleep... No Aubrey... Do you want me to take her to the hospital?...Okay, okay, no hospital. How am I supposed to get her inside?"

She chose that moment to 'wake up'. Opening her eyes, she saw the unmistakeable ginger hair of Chloe Beale. Her older sister's best friend since they were tiny. She blinked a few times, looking into the older girl's eyes, her own began to fill up with tears at the concern shown by Chloe. She looked so flustered and worried. She cared. Nobody really did caring in the Posen household. Only Aubrey and she never came home anymore. Her tears turned into uncontrollable sobs. Chloe crouched next to her and pulled her close, she helped her up and practically carried her into the apartment and over to the couch, holding her until she calmed down and fell back to sleep.

Even after she'd dropped off, Chloe stayed sitting with her, her head in her lap, running her fingers through her soft brown locks. She heard the door slam and turned to shush whoever had walked in.

"Hey Chlo? You here?" The shout echoed through the apartment, causing the young girl to stir.

"Sh Becs. I'm in the living room." She tried to say it quietly but loud enough for her younger girlfriend to hear her. It obviously worked as Beca came through the doorway and frowned at the sight of Chloe holding a teen girl in her lap, a worried and sad look on her face and tears in her eyes.

"Chlo? Who's this? Why is she in our apartment?" Chloe looked to Beca and sighed. She was debating whether or not to wait for Aubrey or tell Beca who this was herself. She knew about Aubrey's siblings, she had just never met them, unlike Chloe who had practically helped Aubrey raise her younger sister.

"This is Sarah." She hoped Beca would catch on. She frowned for a moment before her jaw dropped and her eyes became almost impossibly wide.

"Sarah, as in, Sarah Posen. Sarah, Aubrey's sister Sarah?" Chloe nodded and gestured for Beca to be quiet, her volume creeping up in her excitement.

"What happened to her? Why is she asleep on your lap? Why is she here?" She was greeted with another sigh from the red-head as she shrugged.

"I have no idea. I came home from work and she was curled up against our door asleep. I called Aubrey, she's going to get away as soon as she can. Something bad happened Bec. Look at her. She's 17, she shouldn't be this small. I shouldn't be able to feel her ribs digging into my legs every time she breathes out. I didn't know what to do. I don't know when Aubrey's going to get here." By the end of her little speech she had tears flowing down her face. It was pretty clear to her what had been going on but she would definitely need to talk to Sarah and Aubrey before she jumped to any conclusions. She just hoped she was wrong...

 **AN: so... I know it's like, really short, but I just wanted to see what kind of a response I would get and whether or not you all wanted me to continue with this or try something else... Leave a comment and tell me** :P


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Okay, so I wasn't sure where I was going with this but a few of you seem to like it so I thought I'd try to carry on for you :) sorry it's been so long.**

 **** _'Bold italic writing is Sarah's thoughts, her inner voice if you will' **_**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original characters or plot line...unfortunately :/**

 **Chapter 2 – Sarah POV**

Aubrey came hurtling through the door, waking me up and startling Chloe and the other woman who was sitting on the opposite chair. I quickly realised my position lying across Chloe's lap and sat up, throwing my legs off the ouch so my feet where on the floor and standing up, turning so my back wasn't to any of them. My gaze flickering around the room, barely glancing at Aubrey or Chloe, before landing on the brunette watching me from the armchair. She was safe to look at. She doesn't know me, Bree and Chlo always told me that they know when I'm lying because my eyes 'always tell the truth' whatever that means. If I look at them, they'll know something's wrong.

In fact, don't even look at the brunette, just look at the ground. Yes, that's a good idea, don't make any eye contact, look at your feet. Dad always likes that. Don't engage, don't speak, just be spoken to. I can hear my father's voice circling in my head " _Children should be seen and never heard."_

I'm thrown from my thoughts by a hand coming to rest on my shoulder. I reflexively flinch and jerk out of the way, feeling my back make contact with a wall, I slide down it, making myself as small as possible. Looking up, I see my sister standing to my left, Chloe is creeping closer on my right and the other girl has gotten up from the armchair and is standing between them. I feel frantic, they're all around me, no way out.

 _ **'They know. They know everything and they're so ashamed. They don't want you here. Look at their faces. You're a mess, Aubrey and Chloe don't need that on top of all the work they have already. And this girl doesn't even know you!'**_

I groan and bang my head back against the wall. Opening my eyes, I look into Aubrey's face and see a look I've never seen before on her face. It's a mixture between upset and scared, a tiny flicker of anger passes through her eyes and I look back down. She's mad with me. Making a scene.

"Sarah?" I hear a foot move, they're getting closer. Closing me in. I can't breathe! My hand flies up to my throat, as if that would help me. Panic is setting in and all I can do is let it run its course. I'm trapped. No escape, can't get away, they're going to see, can't run, can't breathe. The bands around my chest continue to tighten until it feels like I'm being crushed in a vice. My vision blurs so I shut my eyes, I feel somebody sit next to me and put my hand round their wrist. My hand tightens, my hold probably hurts but they don't complain. Someone whispers in my ear,

"Can you feel my pulse?" I nod, unable to speak, still flying into a panic. Her voice is so distorted I barely heard it. The blood in my ears roaring, making it even harder to understand.

"Count it. Let it ground you. One, two, three, four...one, two, three, four...one, two, three, four..." I try to do as she says, but it's hard. Still holding tight to her wrist, feeling her pulse, I feel myself being shifted until I'm pulled against something softer then the wall I was against.

"Breathe with me. Feel my breaths" when the thing I'm leaning on moves, my grip instinctively tightens on her arm. It moves again, in time with her counting. I realise it must be breathing. She's breathing, I try to copy her, like she said. It helps somewhat. My head stops spinning so badly and the roaring in my ears has gone down to a dull whine. My breathing is still a little erratic but I know I'm through the worst of it. I don't know how long we sit there, but when I finally open my eyes, both Aubrey and Chloe are nowhere to be seen. I look to the window, seeing it's dark. I rest my head back on what feels like a shoulder. I tense before it chuckles.

"Hey Sarah. You're okay. Do you want to move or are you happy here for a little while?" I turn slightly to see the brunette sitting behind me, one of her arms around my waist, holding me against her, the other being held tightly in my hand. I quickly let go and she hisses at the painful rush of blood to her hand. I see my fingerprints bruised into her wrist."

"I'm sorry. You didn't have to let me do that. I hurt you." I feel her shrug, my gaze still locked on her sore wrist. A faint call from another room makes her shift behind me.

"Are you coming? Aubrey just called dinner. You don't have to. We can go sit on the couch or in your room if you'd like?"

"You want to stay with me? Aren't you hungry?" She smiles at me.

"Of course I am, but I know you're probably tired and whenever I had a panic attack I didn't like being alone after. I can eat later, if you want to go to bed or just sit and recuperate for a little while or if you want something to eat, it's up to you." I leaned back against her again, mulling over the choices. I know if I don't eat I'll be hungry later and if I go to bed now, I'll be awake at the ass-crack of dawn. Aubrey would be happier if I ate something I'm sure.

"Can we go and find some food? I know I'll be hungry later if I don't eat. And I want to see Bree." She shifted to a standing position behind me, leant forward and offered me her hands to pull me up as well. She took my hand and lead to toward what I assumed to be the kitchen. Bree and Chloe were sat at a little table eating chicken carbonara with Garlic bread, my favourite meal and it smelled amazing. Chlo was the first to notice us and she smiled, her eyes were red rimmed, as if she'd been crying.

"Hey Beca, Sarah, would you like some dinner?" She pulled out the seat next to her and patted it, beckoning me to sit down. I watched her dish up some of the pasta and place it in front of me while the girl who I now knew to be Beca, took the seat opposite me. I thanked Chloe and picked up my fork. After a few mouthfuls I was stuffed, I hadn't even made a dent in the amount of food on my plate. I could feel their eyes on me, but I refused to look up and see their faces, staring at my plate instead. The food taunting me. I saw Chloe slide another slice of Garlic bread over and I frowned at it. I knew if I ate anything else I would probably e sick later, but it was pretty clear they wanted me to eat. Fighting my tears, not wanting to disappoint them, I shovelled another mouthful of pasta into my mouth. I kept going, eating like I was a machine. Shovel it in, chew it a few times then force it down, until I was almost done. By this point a few of my tears had broken free and run down my face, but as I was looking at the table they couldn't see them.

I was about to put in another spoonful when I felt Beca's hand on my arm stopping me. I looked at her crouched next to my chair and frowned.

"Sarah, don't force yourself. You don't have to finish. Don't be pressured. We're just glad you ate something. We don't want you to be ill, if there's too much then just eat what you can okay? Promise me Sarah, you'll stop if you're full."

A few more tears leaked down my cheeks, this time in full view of everyone. Beca reached up to brush them away, stopping just before she touched me and looking at me as if to ask permission. I nodded once and she cupped my cheek, wiping my tears with her thumb. I think I like Beca. She understands me, she seems to know what I need, even when I don't. Aubrey and Chloe are lucky to have her around.

"Please Sarah. Promise you won't make yourself ill eating too much." I nodded again.

"Say it Sarah. Please. I need to know you'll stop if there's too much." I take a deep breath and look right into her eyes as I whisper my response.

"I promise." As I say it, I can feel all the food in my stomach churning up, I know I ate far too much and it feels like it's trying to break its way out of me. My eyes widen, Beca catches it and moves out of my way so I can get out.

"The bathroom is at the end of the hall on the left." All I can do is nod, hand clamped over my mouth as I run, sliding to my knees in front of the toilet, not quite managing to lift the seat before I explode. I'm a mess of sobbing and heaving, barely able to take a breath.

"Ssshhh Sarah, it's okay, you'll be okay. Let it all out." I feel Aubrey's cold hands wipe my hair off of my head and pull it back into a ponytail. Her free hand rubbing soothing circles on my back. When I'm finally able to stop heaving, I lean against my sister, my head buried in her neck, crying.

"I'm so sorry. I made a mess, I'll clean it up. I'm sorry Bree, I really am." I mumble into her collarbone. She just shushed me and I feel her running her fingers through my hair humming a lullaby our grandma used to sing when we stayed with her in our younger years. I start falling asleep, so out of it Aubrey has to pick me up and carry me bridal style to a bed. She lays with me, still humming and playing with my hair. I drift of thinking how things could be all right here. Things could work out, I could be happy. But it only lasts a moment before the nightmares start...

 **AN: so what do people think? I hope it's okay, I don't think I'm too good at writing dark things but this story is going to get considerably darker in the next few chapters before things start to look up for poor Sarah... Review and tell me what you think? Pretty please? :P**


	3. Girl Time

**AN: okay, so I had a few responses for the last chapter. I'm glad people are liking it :) there is a little lemon in this chapter, so if you don't like then don't read :)**

 **Chapter 3 – Girl Time – Aubrey's POV**

I stand in my doorway watching Sarah sleep. I wish I could say she looked peaceful, but I can't. The sheets are twisted around her legs, her hands clenched so hard her her nails are digging into her palms, her dark hair knotted from her violent head thrashing. Her face is screwed up in either pain, fear or both, and she's whimpering. I hear Chloe come up behind me and wind her arms round my waist, her chin on my shoulder. I lean my head against hers.

"What must she have been though Chloe? I know he's not the best parent but I never expected this. She's barely been here a day and already she's had a violent panic attack and thrown up all over the bathroom. What has he done to her?" She sighs and I feel her attempt to shrug whilst still holding me. We stand like that for about 10 minutes before I feel my shoulder getting wet. I look to Chloe to see she's crying, staring at Sarah. I turn in her arms and wipe her tears away with my thumbs, cradling her head between my hands. I lean down to kiss her, pulling back at the small whimper coming from the bed. We both freeze, only relaxing when she doesn't stir, letting us know she's still asleep.

I pull Chlo by the hand toward the other bedroom, where I know Beca is as I can hear one of her mixes playing quietly. I lead the redhead through the door and turn, pushing her against it to close it. The slamming noise causes Beca to raise an eyebrow at me and Chloe to moan. Taking that as confirmation, I lean in and kiss my way up her neck from her collar bone, biting softly at her pulse point. She moans again, louder this time, her hips bucking against mine. I smile into her neck, sliding my hands under her shirt and tease the undersides of her breast with my fingertips. She gasps and I chuckle.

"St-stop being a tease Bree...Oh God..." It's my turn to moan as a smaller set of hands find purchase at my waist, pulling me back against her. Her fingers dipping into the waistband of my jeans.

"Hnnn Beca... please." I feel her teeth graze my shoulder.

"Please what Aubrey? Please stop?" She pulls away and I groan in protest, eyes closed, hand still under Chloe's shirt but no longer moving.

"Please touch me. Please...Don't stop." I feel Chloe shake with laughter.

"It's not nice to be teased is it Bree? But I still don't think you've learned your lesson yet." My eyes flew open at her words, seeing her evil smirk, her eyes fixed on the woman behind me. I barely have time to voice my qualms over what they're planning before I'm unceremoniously thrown onto the bed, Beca straddling my waist, holding me down. I see Chloe approach with our Bella scarves, she leans down and ties my wrists together above my head, using the second scarf to tie them to the headboard. I feel the button on my jeans being popped open by Beca whilst Chloe simultaneously unbuttons my shirt and undoes the front clasp on my bra leaving me bare before them.

"Please, one of you, both of you, somebody touch me... please, God please."

I see them look at each other and share a smirk before turning back to me. I pull against the restraints causing the vixens smiles to widen further. I see Chloe approach, crawling up the bed, one knee either side of my legs. She stops, sitting back so she's straddling my thighs.

"Oh my God... Please!" I groan in frustration. Beca's fingers trail delicately across my chest, just above the swell of my breast before dipping lower to the valley between the pale globes. Chloe's fingers following a similar pattern across my stomach. Innocent touches driving me mad.

"If one of you doesn't touch me in a minute I'm going to combust!"

Chloe chuckles, "Oh but Aubrey, we are touching you."

The sound that escapes me sounds like some kind of animal, a mixture between a frustrated groan and a growl.

"Y'know Chloe, it's getting pretty late, and with Aubrey's little sister sleeping just down the hall... maybe we should stop. I mean, it doesn't feel right."

Chloe nods her agreement and both sets of hands leave my body. I swear I'm going insane from all the teasing. Pulling hard on the restraints I buck my his desperate for any kind of friction. I can tell this is just another level to their teasing from the smirk on Chloe's face at my actions.

"Please, please... oh my god PLEASE! If you aren't going to do anything then untie me so I can do it myself."

My words have the desired effect, causing both women to pounce. Their movements slow and sensual, hands brushing tenderly, lips leaving wet kisses, bringing me to the brink then pushing me back, driving me closer and closer to insanity before finally letting me crash over. Blinded by the white flash of ecstasy behind my closed eyelids. I feel one of them undo the scarf holding me, hearing their whimpers getting louder until they both moan simultaneously, collapsing on either side of me. I hear Chloe start to chuckle, the sound contagious. Before long both Beca and I join her. I'm about to ask her what's so funny when a loud, terrified scream echoes throughout the apartment. We all jump out of the bed, Chloe grabs my elbow as I reach the door, I turn, frustrated.

"What are you doing? She's crying Chlo can't you hear her?"

"Of course I can Bree, but look at yourself. You're not wearing any clothes. Pu on some pyjamas. Bec's gone, Sarah will be fine with her whilst you get dressed."

I look down seeing she's right. I grab the shorts and shirt she holds out to me, throwing them on then sprinting to my baby sister's room. The sight that greets me is heart breaking. She's sitting with her face buried in Beca's neck, sobbing and muttering to herself. She's shaking so violently that my brunette girlfriend is practically vibrating. Whatever she was dreaming about has her terrified.

I feel Chlo nudge my back, encouraging me to slowly approach the bed. As soon as I sit down Sarah throws herself at me, sobbing into my chest, her fists holding on to my shirt so tight her knuckles look like they're going to split her skin. She's close enough now that I can hear what she's muttering. It's a mixture of "Please, no", "Stop" and "I'm sorry". My arms instinctively close around her and I start to rock her, whispering assurances in her ears. I look over her head at Beca, seeing tears spilling down her cheeks, Chloe's arms wrapped around her. I don't recall ever seeing the tiny woman cry before and it wrenches my heart.

Sarah coughs into my neck, taking deep breaths and slowly starting to calm down. I'm stuck between asking her about her dream and what scare her so much or letting her go back to sleep in my arms. I must look as lost as I feel because the silence is soon broken by Chloe's voice.

"Sarah? What happened?"

I feel her shake her head 'no' against me and mimic the action to Chloe who frowns.

"Sarah you know you have to tell us at some point right? If we don't talk about it we won't be able to help. If you want we can do it in the morning?"

she nods and again I copy. Chloe's frown lessens and she starts to pull Beca towards the door a loud noise of protest comes from the small body in my arms. She lifts her head, looking right at them wide-eyed and whimpering. Slowly her arms lift until they're held out like a small child asking for a hug. She's shaking again, I nod at my girlfriends and they come back, complying to Sarah's unspoken request. She visibly calms as they take the space next to her, lying with her head in my lap, my fingers running through her hair.

Before long she's asleep, looking across I can see Beca has just drifted off too, leaving Chloe and I holding them. I reach out with my spare hand, taking the red-head's in mine and squeezing to get her attention before whispering,

"What do you think made her scream like that Chlo?"

"I dread to think. Part of me doesn't want to know, she sounded so terrified. But I know she needs to tell us. If we're going to help her. Did she tell you why she's even here yet?"

"No. but I haven't heard from my parents so I don't imagine it's a good reason."

She nods, her thumb stroking over the back of my hand in circles. She soon drops off to sleep too, leaving me to my thoughts of why Sarah's here. I really hope my suspicions aren't correct. Please whatever God is up there, please let me be wrong about this. My baby sister needs me, so I'm here. Just please, please let me be wrong...

 **AN: so it took a while to write, but I did it :) I've decided I'm not too good at lemons either. There might not be anymore of them... the next chapter will be Sarah's dream, so that you can know what had her so scared and maybe who made her like this :)**

 **Please review, let me know what you think :P**


	4. Fantasy or Reality

**AN: so it's been a long time coming but this is Sarah's dream sequence :) this could be disturbing for some people so if you have any triggers it might be a good idea to skip this one. I wouldn't want to cause a relapse for anyone xx**

 **Chapter 4 – Fantasy or Reality**

Dark. That's all I can see. Darkness, pressing in on every side. I don't know how I got here or what is going on. That's when I hear it. It echoes all around me, bouncing off walls I can't see.

" _Sarah...Sarah, what did you do...Why are you so stupid...Can't get anything right...Waste of space...Waste of time...Stupid Bitch...Fucking idiot..."_ It's HIS voice. All the horrible things HE has said to me. I cover my ears but it does nothing. Like it's echoing around inside my head. The voice gets steadily louder, more angry. Scrunching my eyes up, I pull my knees to my chest and start to rock. Tears stream down my cheeks, impossible to stop, dripping from my chin onto my shirt. I don't know how long I'm there, what time it is or even what day. I hear his boots approaching. Each time one collides with the floor I flinch, screwing my eyes even tighter closed. The glow of the hall light meets my closed eyelids as he throws the door open. His boots stop next to me, his silent demand for my attention going ignored as I keep my eyes firmly locked shut, rocking back and forth muttering to myself "Please stop, please. Don't do this, I'll be good. Please don't. Please, please stop."

His thick fingers find purchase in my hair, pulling me to my feet. I feel the strands being ripped from my scalp in great clumps. Keeping my eyes closed I feel his breath fan over my face. I resist the urge to gag at the smell of Scotch and stale cigars. I sniff and sob, he chuckles.

"Open your eyes girl." my shoulders start to shake, whether it's from my sobs or from fear I'm not sure, but I'm obviously not fast enough to follow his command as I feel the sharp sting of a palm across my cheek. My eyes shoot open, greeted by the sight of his fiery emerald orbs, his sinister smirk. He leans so his thin lips are right next to my ear and whispers,

"Let's play a game... it's called Capture the Rat. You run and I'll come and get you. And when I find you, because I _will_ find you, I get to do whatever I want with you." He leans back to look at my face and chuckles at the fresh tears gathered in my eyes. His hand leaves my hair, his fingers grazing down the back of my neck, down to my shoulder. He pushes me toward the door slightly.

"Run little Rat. I'll count to 15." When I don't move he leans down so his eyes are level with mine and lowers his voice to a dangerous tone.

"One...Two...Three..." my eyes widen as I turn and run. Sprinting down an endless hallway of doors. I can hear his voice following me, still counting. I open one of the doors, behind it lies what can only be described as a torture chamber. I glance round the walls, whips hanging tauntingly, swords and knives with dried blood on the blades leaning in the corners. Chains hang from the ceiling, and what I'm guessing is a rack sits square in the middle of the room. I can't hold in the little whimper that escapes as my eyes take in the horrible sight. I'm pulled from my horror by his voice...

"Eleven...Twelve...Thirteen..." I turn from the room and sprint further down the corridor. If I can reach the end then I might be able to get outside. All I have to do is keep going. Don't stop Sarah, keep running. If you stop, you die. Keep going. Just run. I see the exit taunting me in the distance, but no matter how fast I run, it stays out of reach.

"FIFTEEN! I'M COMING LITTLE RAT!" I whimper again, pushing through the burning in my protesting thighs. My breath coming in short gasps, I grunt as my sweaty fingers find purchase on the bar to open the door. The bright sunlight blinds me as I make it out into nothing. I look around me but all there is is sand. Miles upon miles of sand. Nowhere to hide, nowhere to run, just desert as far as the eye can see. I try to run but it's like moving through treacle. My feet just won't move, my calf muscles burning from the effort. I turn to see the door closed behind me. Trying to calm my erratic breathing proves harder than I thought it would be. I can hear him getting closer and it's all I can do to keep from crying. I can hear him opening and slamming doors, getting cross that he hasn't found me yet. He stops on the other side of the door and I bring my hand up to cover my mouth, holding my breath. He knocks on the door, three loud bangs ring through the air.

"I know you're there rat. There's nowhere for you to run. You're mine."

I collapse to my knees, hand still over my mouth holding in the screams trying to escape. I don't realise I've closed my eyes until I open them and see him kneeling in front of me.

"Found you." His giant hand reaches out to me and I finally let loose a horrendous scream. So loud and long it makes my throat raw. I continue to cry as he grabs my arms, pulling me to my feet then bending and digging his shoulder into my stomach before standing so I rest over his shoulder. We're back inside before I'm even aware what's happening, heading towards one of the doors. He opens it and goes to throw me inside. I hold my hands out to steady myself and accidentally catch the side of his face on the way down. I didn't think his eyes could get any more angry... I was wrong. The green orbs turn to me, burning holes in my head. He approaches where me, still sitting where I landed on the floor. He looks murderous.

"Did. You. Just. Slap. Me?" I frantically shake my head. Apparently the wrong response as he explodes.

"WHEN I TALK TO YOU I EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU INSOLENT LITTLE BRAT! . JUST. SLAP. ME?" I start to cry as he grabs my wrist in his vice grip and pulls me so I'm standing.

"Please, stop. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. Please. I'm sorry dad. Please." I hear the slap before I feel it, it cracks across my cheek sending me right back to the floor.

"Don't you EVER call me that again. You don't deserve to call me that. You're no child of mine." I start to cry as he brings back one of his boots, propelling it into my stomach. I lay their crying as he reigns blows down on my frail body, I feel bones being forced out of place, snapping and cracking under the pressure. I roll onto my back, opening my swollen eyes in time to see his foot above my face, I let out another scream , only as it should've collided I wake up in someone's arms.

I breathe in their scent, shaking and crying, muttering "I'm sorry. Please, stop." over and over, like a mantra. The person holding me starts to rock back and forth comforting my shaking form. I hear Aubrey arrive, staying in the doorway. As soon as I feel the bed dip behind me I throw myself at her. I'm bawling into her chest, holding onto her shirt like a lifeline. She starts to rock too, whispering sweet things in my ear, trying to get me to calm down.

"You're okay Sarah. You're safe. I'm here. Nobody can get you here. Sssshhhh. It's okay."

my breathing slowly returns to normal and I just start to calm down when I hear Chloe's voice.

"Sarah? What happened?"

I shake my head into Aubrey's neck, knowing that if I relive it now I'll never get back to sleep.

"Sarah you know you'll have to tell us at some point right? If we don't talk about it we won't be able to help. If you want we can do it in the morning?"

I nod, knowing that I'll put it off for as long as possible, even if it means avoiding them all. If they find out what goes on in my head they won't want me to stay. The feeling of the mattress moving signalling two people getting up pulls me from my thoughts. I whine in protest, looking right at Beca and Chloe as they try to leave. They can't go. I need them. Don't they realise I need them here with me right now? I reach out to them, silently asking them to stay. I can see my hands shaking. They slowly come back and sit back on the bed. My shakes stop almost immediately and I lie with my head in Aubrey's lap. I feel her fingers start to thread through my hair. The soothing motion calms me enough that I drop off to sleep again, this time dreamless.

 **AN: so here we have it. Sarah's dream. Please review and tell me what you think. I want to know how to improve so if you have any suggestions I'm open to them :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Okay so, I know it's been over a month since I updated but there's been a lot going on at home atm and it's the Summer so the house is full of kids that need watching... pretty poor excuses but it's what you're getting :P School went back yesterday so I should be more frequently :)**

 **Aubrey POV**

I can't sleep. I drifted for a while, holding Sarah in my arms, watching her sleep but I just couldn't drop off that ledge. My thoughts just keep running back to my time in the Posen household. Our father was never a compassionate man, believing firmly in the use of corporal punishments and starvation techniques to get his way. I don't even want to try and count the number of times I was sent to my room with no food for the day, or having to kneel on the stone kitchen floor with the back door open, freezing my ass off because I'd made a fuss at bath time. Life with Michael Posen could never be described as easy. But I didn't think he could go this far. I feel tears prick at the backs of my eyes, refusing to let them fall out of habit.

My seventeen year old sister is currently lying in my bed grossly underweight, littered with bruises in various stages of healing and scared out of her mind. That's not okay! Chloe was right, we need to talk. As soon as they're all up we will be sitting down for a chat.

 **Chloe POV**

I watched Beca's fingers slowly run through Sarah's hair, snagging occasionally in small knots, remnants of all her tossing and turning throughout the night. I flicked my gaze up to Beca's face, her own eyes watching Sarah sleep between us, looking forlorn and melancholy. I stretch out and run my own fingers up her arm bringing her attention to me. She sees he question in my eyes and lowers her head. I see the shadows flickering in her gaze before she can avert it though.

"Becs, what's wrong? Talk to me." She just sighs and continues running her fingers through Sarah's, now silky hair. "Beca. Please. What's the matter?" When she looks up again I see the tears spilling from her eyes, making slow trails down her cheeks.

"It's not right Chlo. Nobody should do this to another person. Look at her. She's broken. He broke her. That's not okay. Not by any stretch of the imagination. No parent should ever treat their child this way. Look. At. Her. She's been beaten, starved, cursed and God only knows what else. H-how can anybody...I just...it's not right."

Her eyes follow me as I get up and walk round the bed, sliding in behind her and holding her to me as she lets go and sobs. Gut-wrenching, full body shaking sobs. Her tears leaking into my pyjama shirt, but I don't care. My hand runs up and down her back in soothing circles, trying to calm her down lest she wake Sarah. I hear rather than see Aubrey approach the bed again. She touches Beca's shoulder and looks to me questioningly. I just shake my head and mouth 'later' to which she nods and leans down to rouse her sister.

"Becs, it's time to get up. Want to come with me to clean yourself up while Bree gets Sarah?" she nods, head still buried in the crook of my neck. She inhales one long sniff before sitting up and taking my hand, pulling me to the bathroom.

 **Sarah POV**

I wake to the feeling of someone running their hand through my hair, my head in their lap. I feel myself stiffen on instinct before the events of the previous day come flooding back to me. I'm safe. Forcing myself to relax I feel the hand still in my hair but not moving, moaning out my displeasure, I shake my head slightly to give them a hint as to what I want. A small smile graces my features at hearing Aubrey's laugh. She always was the only one who could make me smile.

"Come on sleepy head. It's time to get up. I made French toast for breakfast. Or there's cereal, or just normal toast, or I can do eggs. Whatever you want." I roll over to see her worried expression and smile at her to try and calm her down. I move to get up and follow her as she leads me to the kitchen. She places a single slice of breakfasty goodness on my plate and hands it to me, a small smile on her face. I try to smile back, but it feels more like a grimace.

"Just eat until you're full okay? I think we should try doing little and often. Sound okay?"

I nod, a small smile on my face as I put the first mouthful in and chew slowly. I look to the two empty chairs at the table and frown.

"Beca was a little upset this morning. Chloe's just helping her to calm down and clean herself up then they'll be out." My eyes widen. Beca's upset. Why? Was it me? Did I upset her somehow? What other reason would she have to be upset? Doesn't she want me here? I look at Aubrey to see her frowning at me, worry evident in her eyes.

"What's wrong Sarah?" I managed to cough out one syllable.

"Why?" Understanding dawns on Bree's face as she immediately back-pedals on what she said.

"Oh no, Sarah, it had nothing to do with you! You didn't do anything! Beca likes having you here, knowing you're safe. She's upset at the situation leading to your arrival but don't ever think you're not wanted here or that we don't love you." she's around the table holding me to her faster then I can blink. It shocks me a little but I soon relax into her hold. I don't think I can fully believe her until I've seen Beca for myself but her words are still a comfort. Speak of the devil, Beca and Chloe emerge from the hallway and take in our position. Beca's smile is small but Chloe's practically splits her face in two.

"Yay! Group hugs!" she wraps her arms around Aubrey, her hands coming to rest on my arms. I'm still looking at Beca. She still looks a little upset. Just standing in the doorway, arms wrapped around herself. I extract myself from my sister and her girlfriend and slowly walk over to the brunette, stopping in front of her and making the same gesture she did to me the night before and holding my arms out but not touching her until she gives me the okay. She smiles a little wider and pulls me in to her, wrapping her arms around me and chuckling. I rest my head on her shoulder and she presses a kiss to my forehead. I smile, relieved that she's not too upset anymore. I feel her lead me to the table again, sitting next to me and pushing my quickly cooling breakfast in front of me. I eat three quarters of the slice before putting the knife and fork together and pushing my plate away. I look down, disappointed in myself at how little I managed to eat. I feel Beca tuck my hair behind my ear before leaning forward and kissing my head again.

"Well done. I'm proud of you. You did so well." I meet her eyes and see her smiling, encouraging me. Her clear love shining through her actions and words. She takes my plate to the sink and I hear Aubrey yawn, stretching as much as she can in the uncomfortable dining chairs.

"Shall we relocate to the living room? There are some things we need to talk about. Okay Sarah?" Knowing they're referring to last night I nod my head and make my way to the couch. Bree sits next to me and pulls me into her side, understanding that this is going to be hard for me and offering what little comfort she can. We sit in silence for a good five minutes before Chloe clears her throat. I look around at the three of them, Aubrey next to me, Chloe on the armchair and Beca on the floor, her head resting on Chloe's knee. All three pairs of eyes are trained on me.

"Wh-What do you, um...What do you want to know?" Aubrey doesn't hesitate in answering.

"Everything. But I know that's hard, so how about we start with why you're here? Do they know you're here?"

I start worrying my bottom lip between my teeth before shrugging. I look at Aubrey's frown and sigh. "I left a note. So they knew where I was headed but I haven't seen mom in over a week because she leaves for work before I'm up for school and comes home well after I'm in bed. and Dad probably doesn't care. At least I'm out of his way right?" I can't look at any of them, their pitying glances making me angry so I train my gaze on the floor. I feel Aubrey's grip tighten on me slightly.

"Sarah, what drove you here? It's been bad for a while, what pushed you over the edge?" I gulp. This was the question I didn't want to answer. I knew they would hate me for the answer. They would be disgusted with me. I scrunch my eyes shut and fight to keep the tears from falling.

"He just went too far."

"What does that mean. 'Went to far' What did he do Sarah?" I let out a breath, feeling my hands start to shake, my chest starting to tighten. Beca notices and crawls over to us, offering my her hand which I take and squeeze.

"Maybe we should try another question first Bree?" I hear her ask. I feel Aubrey lean back to look at me, seeing my pained expression, eyes screwed shut, lips pursed, shaking. She sighs and pulls me to her chest.

"I'm sorry Sarah. I just... I'm worried about you. You know that right?" I nod. "If I ask will you answer yes or no? So you don't have to say it?" I hesitate before nodding, knowing this is just how Bree is. She needs to know all the facts before she can build up a case or an opinion. Habit of being brought up by lawyers and attending law school herself.

"Okay, so... um... did he ever force you to do anything to him. Like in a... sexual way? I'm sorry, I just, I need to know." I screw my eyes tighter and shake my head no. I feel her release a huge sigh, one mirrored by both Chloe and Beca before she carries on. "He beat you. Did he ever use anything? Or just his hands." I take a deep breath, hold it, count to ten then release before answering.

"He used to throw stuff. Bottles, glasses, plates, mugs. Anything he could get his hands on that would break on impact. He also used his belt. That was his favourite. If I had my school uniform on he used to hit the backs of my legs where my skirt didn't cover with his belt." I hear Chloe sob from across the room but still refuse to look up and meet any of their gaze. I can feel Aubrey's breathing is ragged, I know she's fighting to stay strong for me.

"He still locked you in the closet, like he used to do to us. The starvation and isolation all rolled into one." I nod "Okay, I think this is the last one, did he ever do anything to you... in a sexual nature. Touch you or anything. Please Sarah, I know this is hard, but I need an answer. I need to know how to help you." I clear my throat, mentally distancing myself from what I'm about to say. Even I'm surprised by the monotone sound my voice has when I speak. Like I've shut off all my emotions.

"He used to lie with e in bed, saying he missed mom, that she didn't love him. He would hold me all night, I would find it hard to sleep but when I did I would wake up with his hands up my shirt or on my thighs. He never went any further. I didn't give him chance. I left." I finally looked up to see Chloe and Beca, tears streaming from their eyes, trying to hold in their sobs. I looked at Aubrey last. The fury in her eyes startled me, but beyond that was worry, sadness and defeat. She thought she'd failed me. I could see it in her eyes. I reached up to wipe away her tears and pulled her to me. Holding her as she cried.

I could feel her tears staining my shirt but I didn't care. I had had time to come to terms with what had happened to me but they had only just found out. I knew I was safe now. I knew Aubrey would protect me, that she would never let me go back. I looked to see Beca was back with Chloe, curled up in each other's arms. Aubrey pulled back, her hand finding it's way to my hair, stroking down until she was cupping my cheek, making me look right at her.

"You're not going back. Not ever. You're staying here with me. Forever." Her confirmation was apparently what I needed as I immediately burst into floods of tears. Sobbing and sobbing, seemingly unable to stop. I don't know how long I sat curled in Aubrey's lap before Chloe came over to us and held my head in both her hands, but it must have been a long time because she wasn't crying anymore and she was dressed for the day, no longer wearing pyjamas.

"Sarah, listen to me. You need to breathe. I know you're upset, I know it seems impossible but you need to listen to me. If you can't stop then I'm going to have to take you into the ER and ask them to sedate you. It's the only way for you to calm down. Don't make me do that Sarah. Breathe with me. In, two, three, four. Out, two, three, four. Good, again... well done... keep going... calm down." I managed to calm myself with her breathing technique, only to be overcome with fatigue and exhaustion. I could barely keep my eyes open. My head drooped onto her shoulder before jerking back awake.

"It's okay Sarah. You can sleep. It will be good for you. We're not going anywhere. You're okay. You're safe now. We're here. Sshh sh sh, you're okay." I fell asleep to Chloe's whispered comforts, a dreamless blackness, peacefull for the first time in a long time.

 **AN: I know the ending was a little abrupt but I wanted to finish this and at least get something out there :) sorry again for taking so long to update. I'm sorry :) Review with thoughts :P**


	6. The Beginning

**AN: I know it's been a long time and y'all are probably sick of excuses or don't believe them anyway so I'm just going to say... personal issues and apologise and leave it at that...**

 **Chapter 6- SPOV**

Sitting on the sofa, some cop show playing in the background and a plate of chopped apple Beca left for me on the coffee table, I write. I found an empty notebook in Aubrey's room and assumed she wouldn't mind me writing down my thoughts, getting everything out. Mostly I'm doing it because I'm bored, if it turns out it helps then that's an added bonus. I sigh, tapping my pen against the page, reading over what I've already written.

 _Jobs suck. I mean, I know people need them to get money and stuff but right now? That really sucks ass. With such short notice of me arriving my sister couldn't get time off from the firm she's working with, Chloe had to go in for a 20 hour shift in the ER and Beca had to go to the grocery store for food. She offered for me to go with her but I don't like crowded places. Being touched by people, even accidentally can set me off and freak me out. I know it's stupid but_ _I just can't help it. I don't mean to be a freak. That's what they used to call me in school, a freak. I was the weird kid who always sat at the back trying not to be noticed, who got nervous and twitchy whenever a teacher called on me for an answer, but still managed to get good grades. It didn't help my case that I was younger than everyone else in my year, see I skipped a couple grades. I graduated at age 16 with a 2385 SAT score (beating Aubrey by 15 points) but couldn't get any colleges to accept me without an accompanying adult, saying I wasn't old enough yet, to wait until I was 17 at least. Which left me in the house with nothing. I could take a few hours to practice my dancing (I've been taking ballet since I was 3 but my father said Ballet school was out of the question). After a while that got kind of hard, what with the bruises and sprains I was trying to hide, I hide to stop lessons, and, pretty soon couldn't move enough to dance for my own merit._

 _I was devastated. I've always loved dancing. I still remember my first dance recital, mom and dad didn't come but Michael had brought Aubrey. He was 17, she was 10 and I was 4. They bought me a huge bouquet of yellow roses backstage after the performance. I was so pleased. In that moment I honestly didn't care that my parents hadn't come to see my first recital, my two favourite people were there. My sister whom I loved and strived to be like and my big brother Mike, my hero. In that moment, my little four year old self believed things to be perfect. Mike left for College August but he called all the time. He always wanted to talk to me, to hear about my week and about Jimmy Halls sticking Gum in my hair or how I lost my first tooth and couldn't wait for him to see the huge gap in my mouth when he came home at Christmas. I never did get to show him. Mom got a call at 3:00am on November 19th, Mike had been in a car accident. A drunk driver had run a red and hit his car. He was in surgery and they would recommend us going down to see him to 'say Goodbye'. I cried when she told Aubrey to pack a few clothes and walk me next door to the Jameson's house. I screamed and cried and begged her to take me with her, I wanted to see Mike. That was the first time my dad ever hit me. I wouldn't give up and he just wanted to leave and get to his only son. I was holding him back an he snapped. He looked almost as shocked as I did after it had happened but he soon came back to his senses. I was too shocked to respond. I remember him talking to Aubrey but I don't remember what he said. Just that when they came home, Mike wasn't with them, and whenever I asked, dad would get cross or mom would cry. Aubrey told me that God had taken him. I thought he'd been kidnapped and I wanted him back. She explained that Mike was in heaven and that it was good there because God let him play football all the time and he could eat whatever he wanted and always choose the channel for the TV. That confused me even more. It just made me ask more questions. I pushed too hard though. I was watching my dad on the night of Mike's funeral, he was drinking something in a crystal bottle that smelled bad, I now know it was whisky or scotch but I didn't know that then. I watched him pour some and drink it then pour more, he was looking through Mike's yearbooks and picture albums. I had never seen my dad cry, but that night I watched as he sobbed rubbing his fingers over the faces in the album. He didn't know I was there. He coughed and sobbed, trying to pour more drink but spilling it. I was only 4, I thought I could help him. We'd been pouring our own milk in school that week so I thought I could do it, but when I walked in he just got mad. When I asked why he was crying he started shouting at me, I never liked noise and he was being loud so I covered my ears, but he was drunk and thought I was being rude so he grabbed my wrists and pinned them at my sides. He was squeezing them, it hurt me but I didn't cry out. My daddy was crying and that meant he was sad. He didn't mean to hurt me. He started to shout louder and shake me, getting louder and louder, my knees were shaking with fear. He pushed me, my back colliding with the corner of his desk. Then I did cry. It hurt so bad, I shouted and it seemed to bring him out of his stupor. It also brought mom and Aubrey downstairs to his office to see what the shouting was about. I remember him picking me up and carrying me to bed, promising to never do it again, that it was our secret, nobody could know, that he was sorry. I told him he didn't mean it, he was sad. I fell asleep with him rubbing my back, still crying._

 _See? It was all my fault. He was never an abusive dad until then. Okay, he was absent, never around, married to his job but he would never raise a hand to any of us. I drove him to that. ME. He started with me then moved on to Aubrey too. The slightest thing would make him Irate. Mom just kept out of his way. If I hadn't been in his study that night nothing would've happened. He wouldn't have had cause to hurt me, he wouldn't have ever started on us. But he did. And it's all my fault..._

"What-cha Doin?" I jump and throw the notepad down next to me. I was so engrossed in my writing that I hadn't heard the front door open or Beca walk into the lounge. I just sat there, wide-eyed and staring at her. Her eyebrows furrowed, her smirk disappearing. She reached out and stopped before touching my face to let me know what she was doing before running her fingers across my wet cheek. I hadn't even realised I was crying. I quickly wiped my cheeks and smiled at her.

"Hey, what did you bring for dinner. Bree should be home soon, maybe we could make it before she gets here." I slowly got up from the couch and closed the notebook, leaving it on the coffee table to retrieve later. I walked to the kitchen turning round to see if she was following, only to see her frowning at where I had just been sitting, her gaze flicked between the couch and the book before she shook her head a little and turned to me smiling.

"Totally. I thought we could make either Hunter's Chicken or a Thai green curry. Which do you think?" I shrugged as she started digging through various grocery bags, pulling out the chicken breasts and Bacon. I grab two aprons and hand her one, putting on the other before starting on grating some cheese and cutting up veggies to go with our dinner.

I'm half way through a carrot when I hear Beca start to hum, then sing quietly, slowly getting louder. I was right, her voice is amazing. I put down the knife and close my eyes listening to her sing as she prepares the BBQ sauce.

 _I won't break,_

 _No, I won't run_

 _This time I won't be afraid ooh_

 _I got Demons_

 _I got Demons trying to get to me_

 _But they'll never take me down_

 _I'm only human_

 _Underneath my skin the cuts run deep_

 _I just need a little time to work it out..._

The words crash through my walls and crumble my delicate psyche. I feel the tears that escape from my eyes and run down my cheeks, I loathe the treacherous giveaway sob as it rips through my chest, I feel my back slide down the cupboard as more sobs overtake me. My knees pull to my chest, forehead resting on the cupboard next to me, I've boxed myself into the cabinets. I hear Beca kneel in front of me, feel her tucking my hair behind my ears, her hands are on my cheeks making me look at her, dark blue eyes meet my icy blue ones and all I see is concern and worry. She's scared. I take deep breaths, moving my hand up to her wrist, much like I did the night before, feeling for her pulse. It's racing with her panic at what just happened but I still use it to anchor myself, taking care to not squeeze her arm like I did yesterday.

When I'm finally back under control I smile at her. She pulls me in to lean on her shoulder and rubs her hand through my hair. She just seems to know what I need, even before I do. I don't know how but she does. It's kind of scary. I feel her chuckle.

"I've been there. I know what people did for me and I know what works and what doesn't."

"You read minds now?" She huffs out another chuckle, I feel her shoulders shaking with a little laughter.

"Oh yeah. It's my super power. It's it totes aws?" Now I chuckle at her impression of Chloe. I look up at her to see her smiling at me. I laugh a little harder, my emotions in full whacko mode swinging from one extreme to the other. My laughter seems contagious because pretty soon we're both collapsed in fits of giggles =, dinner long forgotten. And that's how Aubrey finds us 20 minutes later.

 **Crappy ending I know but it's like, 1:00 am and I have to get up at 6 tomorrow :( but I really want to get this bit out there. I'm hopeful that the next update won't take this long. I'm so sorry. Review and let me know if you have any ideas what you want to happen next...Review even if you don't :P**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: So what did you guys think of chapter 6? I don't actually know where I'm going myself with this Story so I apologise if it sucks ass... seriously, my inspiration just up and left :/**

 **Chapter 7- SPOV**

The last few days had flown by. Aubrey and Chloe would go to work during the day, leaving me with Beca whilst she worked on her mixes. Sometimes I would help or she would let me listen to them as she was going. It was fun. I liked spending time with Beca. She seemed to understand what I needed, like she knew what I was going through. She could pull me out of a panic attack better than anyone else. She knew how to deal with me. Don't get me wrong, I love Aubrey and Chloe, I do. But they don't understand me. They want to help me 'get better'. They don't understand that there is no 'better'. I can learn to live with this but it will always be there, I can't make it go away like a common cold. This is me. It's permanent.

I write in my book every night. I find it therapeutic. I write the things that nobody else knows, the 'little secrets' not even Aubrey knows how long I suffered before he started on her. I didn't admit it was happening until I was six and a half. Two and a half years I didn't tell her anything. My mom knew. There was no possible way she couldn't, she'd see the bruises on my back when she bathed me or the marks on my legs when she helped me pull up the tights for my uniform. We never talked about it though. I used to think he had secrets with her too, maybe that's why she was quiet and she was always tired. I would write down all these thoughts in the notebook. It was already half full, I would write all morning whilst Beca worked then sit with her in the afternoon and leave it. I would write again after everyone had gone to bed. It was really helping me. My panic attacks had been fewer since I started and I know it's only a book but I honestly feel as if I'm sharing my problems. That it halves them. I'm not carrying them around because they're tucked away under my pillow. I don't have to bear their weight anymore. They're still there, they're just lighter. So Imagine my complete horror when I go to write and the book isn't in it's hiding place.

I was completely powerless to stop the animalistic cry that broke free from the confines of my chest. Walking into the lounge in search of the notebook I was writing in earlier that day, only to find my sister sobbing her heart out on Chloe's shoulder the book in question sitting open on the coffee table. She read it. She knew. My secrets were out. Both women had turned at the noise I made. Aubrey's eyes red and puffy, Chloe trying to hold her own tears back. I could feel my breathing start to pick up speed, my heart flying faster than should be possible. Dark splodges encroaching on my vision. I'm panicking. Badly. It's coming and I can't stop it. I feel my knees buckle and a pair of arms catch me as I crumple to the floor and everything goes black...

**********************************APOV*************************************

A thumping headache, sore feet and a never ending flight of stairs greet me as I walk through the reception of our apartment building. Why today of all days does our elevator need to be out of service. Today when I'm laden with case files that weigh a tonne and these God awful, killer pumps.

Finally pushing the door open I drop all my bags in the entryway, kick off my shoes and collapse onto the couch. It's awfully quiet and I'm almost asleep when I feel a something sharp digging into my ribs. Digging it out I see the notebook Sarah's been writing in since she got here. I know I shouldn't. I know it's wrong. The little voice in the back of my head is screaming at me to just throw it on the coffee table and go to sleep, but I'm curious. Beca told Chloe and I that she often finds Sarah writing in here and crying. That she upsets herself sometimes. The thing about curiosity is that it can be a curse. I'm dying to know what's in here but I know it's private. I know she'll never forgive me if she finds out I read her diary. It's like wrestling myself subconsciously. Right verses wrong. I shake my head at myself and throw it onto the coffee table, overshooting it causing the book to land open on the floor. Open on a page covered in Sarah's curly handwriting. Handwriting that's smudged at the bottom of the page due to tears falling on the ink.

All sense of privacy and respect flew out the window upon seeing the tear marks. I had to know what was wrong. I had to know how to help my baby sister, I need to know what he did to her. So I read. I tell myself it's only one page but I know it's a lie. Once I start I won't be able to stop.

 _I remember the pain. He could make me hurt so much I couldn't move. Using his fist or his belt, hitting so hard I couldn't breathe. And the worst part? I deserved it. He was right, there's nothing good to come of me in the world. He gave me a roof over my head and a place to sleep and I had nothing to give back. I wasn't allowed to tell anyone. Never tell anyone. That's what he would whisper in my ear as he tucked me in my bed at night, squeezing my arms tight. So I never did. I never dared. My life was completely under his control. I will forever have the scars on my body, engraved in my soul. It was always the same. He'd turn, grab me by the throat, punch me in the ribs, kick me until I bled and passed out, showed me that he owned me, that he was in charge. I don't think he ever spoke to me, only yelled. He made me feel worthless, told me I would never be anything, that I was stupid and worthless and that one day, I would end up alone with nobody to care whether I lived or died. He said there was no hope for me. Not a day could pass where I wasn't cursed or mocked. I never believed him, not until the day Aubrey left for college. The person I though loved me more than the world itself left at the first chance she got and hardly visited. I know it's irrational but that's what it felt like to me..._

 _His eyes. That look. The mad as hell 'red-fire' eyes are seared into my brain. It was the look that let me know I was about to be punished. That I'd somehow found a way to do something wrong even if I'd done nothing at all. I was terrified. I learned not to cry after a while. Crying made things worse. Made him even more angry, made the punches more powerful. He was there. He was always there, always watching with those ice blue eyes, following my every move with his burning gaze. I couldn't sleep at night for fear of what he would do. I would sit on my bed and pretend I couldn't feel him watching me. It terrified me that if I closed my eyes, he could do anything and I wouldn't know. I still can't sleep, when I close my eyes my mind is plagued with images of things he did, threats he shouted at me. The past replays itself until I wake up screaming. I know I told Aubrey that he never made me do anything to him but I lied. He used to make me kneel on the floor between his legs with my head on his thigh and he would stroke through my hair, telling me he loved me. He would hold my wrist forcing my hand to stroke his thigh through his pants. He would always demand that I look at him when he did that but I couldn't. I never did. That's when he would get cross and slap me. Punishing me for not following orders. I tried but I just couldn't look at his face when he was doing those things, it was wrong..._

 _December 14_ _th_ _2013, I was 15, I decided I was tired of being treated like a piece of crap. We had been learning self defence in school that week and I thought I would put it to good use. He came at me that night, I can't remember what for, probably something trivial, but I shouted back at him. Told him I wasn't a little girl anymore, that he couldn't boss me around. That if he was going to hit me I was going to hit him back harder. He sung his fist at me and I ducked. He hit the wall and roared. That roar of pain and rage drove all the fight right out of me. I turned and fled. I ran through the house, managed to get to the door before I heard him follow. I forgot our drive was a mile long, I didn't even make it to the end before I heard the engine behind me. I turned but it was too late. His bumper hit my leg and knocked me down, he got out and dragged me back up to the house by my hair then proceeded to 'teach me a lesson' that I wouldn't forget in a hurry. He dislocated my hip and left me on the living room floor all evening in pain and broken. My mom found me when she came home late that night and took me to the emergency room. Told the doctors I must have been climbing trees and fallen out of one at a funny angle and that I was home alone so she didn't find me until later. I was in too much pain to be coherent so they had to take her word for it..._

 _I hear his loud screaming_

 _As I run for my bed_

 _He slams the door open_

 _And I know that I'm Dead_

 _He Tells me I'm ugly_

 _He calls me a whore_

 _He screams at me loudly_

 _As I hit the floor_

 _He tosses me round_

 _Off the walls I do bounce_

 _He lifts me up high_

 _Like I weigh just an ounce_

 _The room started spinning_

 _Then it went black_

 _I'm passed out and broken_

 _I won't feel this attack..._

 _He was a perfectionist. Anything less than 100%was a failure. So you can just imagine his reaction when my report cards would come through. Due to his punishments, sometimes I wasn't well enough for school. Every kid has sick days. But my attendance wasn't 100% so it wasn't good enough. And I only got a B in gym, all my other grades were A's but that B was burned into his brain, it was a failure. He was livid. Posen's didn't fail, the concept was inconceivable to him. The punishment for that was a harsh one. He took me outside and hosed me off then tied me to my bed cold and wet with all the windows open. He gagged me so nobody would hear me cry. He left me there for 2 days until I started running a temperature. He liked when I got sick, not hurt but actually sick and weak. He liked nursing me back to health, spending all day with me, feeding me soup and tucking me in, reading to me and 'keeping me company'-_

"Bree I'm home." I jump a mile in the air and drop the book to the floor, caught red handed. Chlo walks round the corner, frowning as she takes me in, sat on the floor next to Sarah's notebook. She runs over to me and pulls me into her chest rubbing my back shushing me. I don't realise I'm crying until I feel the sob rip through my chest.

"Bree what's wrong? Why are you crying? What happened?" I hiccup a few times before deciding I'm not going to be able to speak any time soon so I just pick up the notebook and open it where I left off for Chloe to read. She looks puzzled but reads the pages, gasping every now and then at the things written on the flimsy paper. Her eyes quickly fill with tears as she turns the page to carry on. I pull the book down a little so we can read together...

 _They don't know. Nobody does. Not even Aubrey. They don't know how much it hurts. They don't understand my suffering. The old ladies at church who smile and make small talk at the end of the service on a Sunday have no idea how much it hurts just to stand next to them, to hold myself high. They don't know how much I hide, how tight his hold on me. They'll never understand the biting pain of starvation, the sting of a slap in the face or the stab of betrayal from a loved one. There are people who suspect, who've seen how he holds my arm just a little too tight, how he keeps me close or how I shrink in his presence. But they don't ask about it, they don't question it. I don't know what's worse, the people who don't notice or those who do and do nothing. When your father is an important man in the community that's what happens. People are afraid to accuse, to ask, to know the truth. He's a good man, he goes to church, he works hard, he could never do a thing like that. They must've imagined it. I tremble when he's near me, wince when he raises a hand. They don't understand the struggle. Life is difficult, living is difficult. With every breath I struggle. With every step, I struggle. With every word, every lie, I struggle. My life is a battle, a battle I'm losing. I crave release, for sanctuary. I now there's only one way to find it..._

"That's the last one" I blink at the words, trying to understand what's right in front of me. Desperately trying to believe that they're not talking about what I think they are. That suicide was never an option my baby sister considered. That that's not the sanctuary she's talking about. I let out another sob before Chloe pulls me up and re-locates us to the couch, pulling me against her. I cry into her shoulder for what feels like hours but is probably about 20 minutes. A guttural cry behind Startle both Chloe and I. We turn to see Sarah standing there, her eyes wide, gaze flying from us to the open book and back again. Her breathing starts to pick up and she starts to shake. I don't know what to do. We're caught. She knows that we know, but I don't know what to say, how to make it better. Chloe gets up, her arms out in a calming gesture but before she can say anything Sarah's eyes glaze over. Chlo runs and manages to catch her just before her head hits the floor, laying her out gently, checking her pulse and frowning.

"Bree help me move her to the couch. She'll be more comfortable. Then go get a cool damp cloth from the bathroom." She's in doctor mode. Usually this would turn me on, but right now I'm too scared to even speak. I just do as she asks. Walking back in I see her checking Sarah's pulse again, counting on her watch. The frown is still firmly etched on her face so it can't be good. Holding out the cloth she tells me to dab Sarah's forehead and the back of her neck with it to keep her from overheating. I hear the front door open and close but completely ignore it until I hear Beca gasp and run over, dropping to her knees next to Sarah's head. She looks up to me as if to ask what happened and I just shake my head, handing Chloe the cloth and walking out to the fire escape. The cold air feels nice on my heated skin and chills the tears running down my cheeks. This is all my fault. I f I had only kept my nose out of business that wasn't mine then Sarah would be fine right now. She's going to hate me, and for good reason. I just read her most personal thoughts. I had no right but I did it anyway. I can never forgive myself for this, this ultimate betrayal on my part. I feel Beca's hands wind around my waist, her chin on my shoulder.

"Bree, none of that was your fault. You didn't cause it. We've had a few days with no episodes but she hasn't been sleeping. She's scared of nightmares. We knew it was going to happen sooner or later, Chlo just said that. The wave of emotion caused her exhaustion to catch up with her. She's fine now, just sleeping. You read her diary, but you know how to help her no right? At least a little?" I nod a little but she knows that her words aren't making a dent in my guilt. She forcibly turns me to face her and holds my face in her small hands.

"Aubrey Selina Posen listen to me. You did not cause that. When you picked up that notebook did you read it out of selfish nosiness or to see if there was a way for you to help? Did you do it so you had something to hold over your sister or so that you knew what was going through her head to hep her through this?" I looked into the dark blue pools in front of me seeing nothing but love and trust, she believed that I didn't do anything wrong. That it wasn't my fault. I let out a sigh and nod before leaning in for a hug. I knew as soon as Sarah woke up I needed to apologise, but I also knew a little more about what we were dealing with. I was better suited to helping her now. And I wasn't going to feel guilty for that.

 **AN: so I know it's been forever again but this story is really hard to write. Like, seriously. It's pretty intense :P I love you guys, reviews are always welcome... seriously, I love hearing from you :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: I know I'm getting seriously lax in updating, but seriously, personal life sucks right now. I'm using my boyfriend's computer to post this right now. So... I'm sorry for that. I hope you don't hate me too much to read this :)**

 **Chapter 8 – Mr. Posen POV**

Something's wrong. I know there's something wrong. Sitting in my office, rolling the scotch around my glass. I can't go home. Jane just cries, all the time. It's almost like she's forgotten how to be a wife and a woman all together. She's no use to anyone the way she is now. I just have to look at the stupid cow and she bursts into tears, saying our baby has left because of me. I don't even pretend to know what that means. Everything that brat got was deserved. She misbehaved so she was disciplined. God only help her when she comes home, tail between her legs. She'll pay for making her mother this upset, for missing school, those stupid dance classes I pay for. Ungrateful bitch doesn't appreciate how much I fork out for her to do all this crap and she doesn't even turn up most of the time! I know, Jane called Madame Whatever-Her-Name-Is asking if she knew where the kid was. Jumped up French woman said Sarah hadn't been for a class in over a year. A Fucking Year!

My eyes drift, focussing on the photographs placed atop my desk. One has to act the part of happy, proud father in the presence of colleagues. One from just before my son left for College, a proper family photo. Jane leaning on me, Mike holding Sarah with Aubrey tickling her belly. There's another of just my wife, one of Aubrey's Graduation. I stand, walking to the bookcase that takes up the left wall of my office, looking closely at the photo of Sarah's dance class. It must be ten minutes that passes, staring at the picture before I realise it was taken 6 months ago, she's not even in it. I never noticed. We have the same picture hanging in the hallway at home. The kid must've seen it, she never commented, never told us she wasn't in the picture. Made us look stupid for hanging a picture none of our children are in!

My thought process is interrupted by a knock at my door. I compose myself and call for them to enter. I'm greeted by the jovial smile and red hair of Richard Beale. We've been friends since college, our daughter's were practically inseparable, still are. Last I heard from Aubrey, they were living together somewhere in Atlanta with another friend from College.

"Ah Richard. What can I do for you this evening?"

"I saw your light on. It's late Michael, what are you still doing here? Isn't Jane expecting you home? You always used to make sure you were gone by 7. Said you needed to kiss your kids. Now you're lucky if you leave by 10!"

My smile falls a little at his comment. I know he is concerned, not nosy or judging, but it's none of his business. My family is just that. Mine, not his. I force my smile and shake my head, snorting slightly.

"That was a long time ago Rich. I fear Sarah might think it strange if I requested a goodnight kiss from her now. And Jane understands that my work calls for all kinds of hours."

"Ah yes. Scary thought isn't it? Our children all grown-up. Flying the nest. Have you heard from Aubrey recently?" I couldn't help my eyes narrowing a little.

"Actually, no, I haven't. I'm guessing you have? Anything I should know? How are they doing?" I watched his smile widen even further at my question. If there's one thing Richard it's talking about his kids.

"They're just fine. Chloe's still getting used to irregular work hours with her residency and Aubrey's office is pretty busy. Beca finally got her break, A new club called "Shockwave" She's their resident DJ apparently. And Sarah's applying for Barden and staying with them. You never mentioned that to me! You must be so proud, she's still so young!"

I could feel my face fall. I didn't care that my friend was standing in front of me. I didn't care that he was questioning me. How DARE they. The brat ran off to her sister, who just took her in, no questions asked. Not even a call to say they were both okay. Mark my words they will be hearing from me. I slam my glass down on the desk and look at Richard, seeing him shudder I can't help but smirk.

"Sorry Rich, I must be leaving. After all, it is very late." Shouldering passed him I can barely contain my anger all the way home. When I finally get there I go straight to the Kid's room and explode. In a haze of red, throwing anything I can get my hands on, breaking things, ripping pillows, smashing her glass chess pieces, pulling all her books down, emptying all the drawers. When the haze clears I look around to see the carnage, knowing when she comes back this will kill her. Both Aubrey and her need their things to be tidy, like some kind of compulsion. I have never stood for a mess in my house, it was drilled in to them. The destruction will break her almost as much as her punishment will...

 **AN: I know it's short but I really didn't want to be in that mind set for longer than I absolutely had to be. That was hard to write down. Anyway, Review... please? I only got one last time :(**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: So it's been a while...again :/ I'm sorry, I haven't had any access to a computer or internet since my last update, but I have hand written this chapter and the next so I just need to type them up for you all :)**

 _ ****Just as a side note, a few of you commented on how Mr. Beale told Mr. Posen where Sarah was. He has no idea about the abuse. He knows the Posen's used punishments in their household like spanking and being sent to bed with no supper but he had no idea how bad it actually was. And yes it is possible for people to be deceived that way. You'd be surprised what someone can't see when they don't want to see it.****_

 **Chapter 9 – SPOV**

" _Precious girl, what has he done to you? I've been watching everything, I know everything. Why Sarah? Why didn't you say anything? Not even to Bree? Sweet girl what was going through your head?"_

 _I look around to see I'm standing in the middle of my high school football field. I know I recognise the voice talking to me but I can't place it. A single figure in full Football kit is stood in the End Zone, but I can't see his face under his helmet. Reaching up to shield my eyes from the brightness of the lights I try to squint and see who it is, but I can't._

" _Why Sarah? Why were you always so alone? Why didn't you talk to mom? You were only a little girl, you could've gotten away, lived a happy life."_

" _Who's there? How do you know my name?" He starts to take a step towards me but for every step he takes, I take one back._

" _They could've kept you safe. Taken you out of that poisonous situation. Look at yourself Baby girl. Look what happened."_

" _They would've split us up! He told me they would've split us up. That I would be put with strangers who would hate me, who wants somebody else's mistake in their house?" The player leans over and removes his helmet, revealing a mop of floppy brown hair, he looks at me with his bright blue eyes, eyes that I've missed so much._

" _Mike? Mikey?" I break into a run and throw myself at him. His arms feel just how I remember wrapped tightly around me as he swings me in circles, a huge goofy smile on his face. My face falls as everything comes back to me, his crash, my parents leaving to see him, my dad blaming me, the years of suffering. I struggle to blink back tears as I push his arms off and wrap my own around me, they're a poor substitute for the ones I really want but they're the only ones I trust not to hurt me. Mike reaches for me but I dodge his hands, a couple of rogue tears falling onto my cheeks._

" _Sweet girl, what's wrong? Why are you crying? Don't you trust me?" I sniff and barely shake my head in the negative, but he still picks it up._

" _Why? I would never hurt you Sarah. You know that right?" I look at him then, cheeks flushed and fists falling to my sides clenched in anger._

" _IT'S YOUR FAULT! YOU DIED AND LEFT ME WITH HIM! HE HIT ME BECAUSE YU WERE GONE. ALL THOSE THINGS HE DID BECAUSE YOU DIED. YOU LEFT ME MIKE! I WAS 4... I WAS ONLY 4!" Chocking on my sobs I turned to run, only to have my brother grab me around the waist and pull me into his chest, no matter how hard I punched and fought he just held me. I gave in and just cried. Crying for the brother I lost, for the family that broke apart at the seams, for the little girl that had to grow up too fast, for all the years of secrets and pain that I kept locked away from everyone else. My knees gave out, but Mike picked me up and carried me like he used to when I was little. He sat in a chair, me lying across his lap, his hands in my hair. He brushed the tears from my cheeks, laying kisses across my forehead and hair._

" _SSHH sweet girl, I'm right here... it's okay, you're safe now... I'm never going to leave you... Bree's got you...sh sh sh... you're okay... calm down.." His voice slowly became higher in pitch, gradually changing to the voice of Aubrey, his hand transforming into a smaller, more feminine hand running fingers through my hair._

Sniffing and coughing I opened my eyes to be greeted by the sight of Chloe sprawled across the floor, Beca lying on top of her. Aubrey's fingers never ceased their journey through my hair.

"Sarah?" I didn't move, hoping she'd give up and just let me sit quietly.

"Sarah I know you're awake. Are you okay?... sorry, no, you're not, I know that, I meant... ugh. Sarah you were calling for Mike in your sleep. Was it a bad dream? Do you want to tell me about it?" I shook my head, the tears starting up again. Aubrey tucked my head under her chin and rocked us side to side slowly.

"It was a good dream." She lay a kiss on the top of my head before pulling back to look at my face. She wiped my tears away with her thumbs. My stomach chose that moment to growl. She chuckled.

"You hungry? We can go get you some toast or something?" I nodded standing with her, following her to the kitchen. She grabbed a couple slices of bread popping them into the toaster and flicking the kettle on. I sit at the table watching my sister flit around the kitchen making two mugs of hot chocolate and four slices of toast, carrying it all over before disappearing into the pantry, she leans out after a few seconds holding a selection of jars, I point to the grape jelly, she screws up her nose and grabs the marshmallow fluff, bring both over and sliding the jelly to me, along with a knife and two slices of the toast. I set to work spreading the sticky purple goodness liberally over my snack before taking a huge bite and moaning at the taste. I look at Aubrey with wide eyes when I hear her giggle.

"I think that's the first time in the weeks you've been here that I've seen you actually enjoy food. How can you like Grape jelly that much. Ugh, you're like Beca, she could live off the stuff. Give her the jar and a spoon and she'll be in heaven." I find my lips turning up at the corners without any effort at that image, Beca sitting with a jar of jelly and a spoon like a little kid. A giggle escapes me before I can stop it. Aubrey stares at me wide eyed before joining in.

Finally calming down she reaches for her hot chocolate as I take another bite of toast. I almost choke when she puts her mug down and looks at me with crossed eyes and a chocolate moustache. I'm full out belly laughing, like, I can't remember the last time I laughed this hard.

"What Sarah? Do I have something on my face?" Her question just makes me laugh even harder. I'm so far gone that I don't even see Chloe and Beca standing in the doorway smiling at us until Beca hands me a piece of tissue to wipe the tears off my face as I calm down. She sits next to me, dunking her finger in Bree's hot chocolate and sucking it off, humming in approval. Aubrey playfully scowls at her.

"Hey! Get your own Rebeca! That's all mine." Chloe falls into the chair next to her and reaches over, stealing Aubrey's second piece of toast, quickly taking a bite before putting it back. Bree's jaw drops as she turns to stare at Chloe.

"Chloe!" The redhead shrugs and talks around a mouthful of marshmallow toast.

"What I put it back." MY giggles are officially back as Beca looks at Aubrey.

"Yeah Bree, you need to learn to share." I'm full-out cackling now as my sister practically growls at her girlfriends. I can hardly see through the tears in my eyes, breathing becoming increasingly difficult but for the first time in forever it's not because of a panic. I enjoy this kind of breathlessness. The smiles on all of our faces just cement the fact that I'm safe now just that tiny bit more for me. A tiny notch is being scraped off my walls, a teeny-tiny crack in the foundations. Things can only get better from here... right? 

AN: **So I know it's only a little one but I hope to have the next couple updated pretty quickly. Review and tell me what you think :) xx**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Okay, so I know I told you this would be updated sooner, thing is it's been written for a while, it's just finding the time to sit and type when I'm constantly surrounded by children. They're back to school on Tuesday though so updates should be more frequently, I'm aiming for weekly :) any-who, read on, enjoy yourself... no seriously, you better enjoy it :P**

 **Chapter 10 – SPOV**

I can't hear properly over the roaring in my ears, can't see around the red haze clouding my vision. I was fine, we were getting along, I was actually laughing... until we relocated to the living room. Seeing my journal lying wide open on the coffee table brought back the memories. _Walking in to see Aubrey and Chloe reading, the panic, collapsing._ I close my eyes and try to push back the rage encroaching on my rationality. She never meant to hurt me, Aubrey would never do that. I know she wouldn't. She's not like him. I know she's not. But I still can't believe she did this. How could she? She knew I was secretive about what I was writing. She deliberately broke my trust and read all my secrets. Her and Chloe both, how do I explain myself now? how do I even look at them?

"Sarah, we're sorry. I know I never should've read your diary. But I have, there's no going back, I can't un-see the things I read. Sarah? You never told me. All those years? You never said anything, why didn't you come to me? I could've helped, I'm a terrible sister for not seeing it but why didn't you tell me? Didn't you trust me? Did I do something?"

Balling my hands into fists in an effort to hide the shaking I let out a shuddering breath and just screw my eyes even tighter shut.

"Sarah, I could've done something. You were just a baby and you kept this secret, all those times I teased you, made you cry, made you so angry you never lashed out. Never even cried. I feel terrible. I was a horrible sister to you, I was trying to get you to show any emotion, even negative ones and in doing so I must have made things so much worse. I'm so sorry Sarah, I really am. Can you ever forgive me?"

I can't help it, I explode before I can stop myself.

"NO! YOU DON'T GET TO MAKE THIS ABOUT YOU! YOU'RE SO SORRY, YOU DIDN'T MEAN TOO. YOU WERE ONLY A CHILD. WELL SO WAS I AUBREY. I WAS FOUR YEARS OLD! FOUR! I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF IT! I DON'T CARE HOW FUCKING SORRY YOU ARE, AS YOU SAID IT DOESN'T CHANGE ANYTHING, YOU'VE ALREADY READ MY JOURNAL! WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NEXT, HUH? INSTALL CAMERAS? I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. NOT EVEN HE READ MY JOURNAL! THE ONLY THING I'VE EVER HAD TO MYSELF IS MY THOUGHTS, MY OPINIONS AND NOW YOU'VE INVADED THOSE!"

I let loose an almighty scream and before I realise what I've done my fist has smashed through the living room mirror. My eyes go wide, filling with tears that spill over and down my cheeks. My back goes rigid, my shoulders stiff as I hold my breath. I can't believe what I've just done. I'm no better than him. My emotions got the better of me and I lashed out. Looking down to my fist I can see the blood slowly leaking down my knuckles and fingers, tiny pieces of mirror glinting from within the cuts. The pain is stabbing through my haze, the red clouding my vision receding. I hear someone call my name but before they can get close to me I bolt. Running down the hallway I see the open window leading to the fire escape. I'm out and up faster than a bullet out of a gun.

Dissolving into heaving sobs I fall to my knees on the roof. Closing in on myself, moving to the corner and pulling my knees to my chest I cry, loud, wailing cries. Full of all the agony and desperation I've kept hidden since I was a little girl...

 **APOV**

I stand wide-eyed, staring at the little girl who just exploded in my face. She was right of course, I'd made it about myself. She didn't deserve anything she's been dished out in life. I'm fooling myself into thinking I could've done something if she'd only come to me, but I know I never could have. I was barely more than a child myself! I'd made her think I blamed her for not telling me, that I thought she deserved it. I see her clenched fists and the rage in her eyes and I flinch. I can't help it, she looks so mad right now. I hear the smash before I realise what's happened. My mind taking a few seconds to catch up with it all, her arm swinging around, her small fist making contact with the mirror, shattering it and cutting up her hand. She freezes, her shoulders tensing. I see Chloe fretting behind her, her mouth moving but it's like I've gone deaf. I can't believe what I just witnessed. All my years of trying to get this to happen, to break just one wall down and reach the Sarah I know and love. To burst the damn and let everything out, all the black shadows of her past that slowly suffocate her from the inside.

I blink and she's gone, tearing down the hallway towards the fire escape I left open earlier. I'm about to throw myself out and follow her but someone grabs me around the waist. I fight, kicking and crying but it's to no avail. I'm turned into the firm embrace of Chloe. No matter how much I fight her she doesn't let me go, if anything she holds me tighter. I can hear Sarah's cries in the background, full of pain and worlds of hurt. We sink to our knees as I sob into Chloe's neck. I cry for the little girl I didn't save, for all the things I saw but buried under layers of denial. My eyes start to droop, I have no idea how long we've been sitting here in the hallway but Chloe's hand running through my hair and her sweet singing in my ear is lulling me into sleep. I try to fight but she just holds my head against her shoulder.

"Sssshhhh Bree, it's okay. I'm here. I've got you."

I can't hear Sarah's cries anymore, all I can hear is the rhythmic beat of Chloe's heart as she starts to rock us back and forth slowly...

 **BPOV**

I tore off after Sarah, watching as she ran up the fire escape and practically dived for the roof. I'm half way up when I hear the first cry, full of despair and pain. I recognise the sound as one of total resignation. Everything she's kept to herself, all her dark secrets have been brought to light and it's catching up with her. She can't push them down anymore and it's brought her to breaking point. All the hurt that can't be repressed anymore is trying to break free, all the memories flying at her, all at the same time. I rush up the last few steps and trip onto the roof, my eyes sweeping round, searching for the source of those anguished wails. I see her curled in on herself in the corner, her arms wrapped around her knees like she's trying to hold herself together. I run and slide to my knees next to her, touching her arm to let her know that I'm there. The sight of her causing tears to leak down my face, my own sobs drowned out by her painful cries. I sit down next to her slowly moving my hand to her back and rubbing small circles into it. My other hands works on loosening the grip she has around her legs, taking her injured hand in mine, careful not to hurt her more I let her squeeze my fingers in her death grip. I gently guide her into my embrace when she starts to shake from the cold. I know she's not ready to move yet so I wrap my arm around her and start to hum. Hoping that my presence makes her feel a little bit better, knowing that there's somebody here with her...

 **SPOV**

I don't know what's happening to me. My body seems to have a mind of its own, my sobs echoing off the walls either side of me. I can't seem to stop, all the feelings I've had bottled up inside have escaped like shadows and I can't reign them in, I can't catch them or keep hold of them. My secrets are out, the last thing I had control over has gone. It's like the carpet has been pulled out from under me, leaving me winded and unable to breathe lying sprawled on my back. I feel a hand in mine and another on my back. I squeeze, a familiar action that lets me know this is a person I trust. I can feel myself shaking, whether from exhaustion or cold I don't know, but the hand on my back starts to guide me into a warmth, the type that can only come from another person. I manage to breathe in through my sobs, recognising the lavender smell of Beca I lean into her a little more. I have no idea how long we sit there before the cries stop, all I know is that the warmth coming from Beca and the sounds of the city below us are slowly lulling me into a sense of coherence and calm.

I let go of her hand only to wrap my arms around her, holding onto her shirt with no plans to let go in the near future. I can feel that my eyes are swollen and my lips are chapped, my nose all snotty and full. I'm a state, a complete mess but I can't find it in myself to care. I'm not alone. For the first time I remember there's somebody here whilst I cry. Somebody who's holding me close and comforting me instead of slapping me and telling me to grow up. I'm amazed again at how Beca knows exactly what I need before even I do. I feel her shuffle closer and wrap her hoody around us both, her arms then winding around my back and holding me to her.

"Sarah?" I snuggle closer, not ready to face the world yet. I feel one of her hands make it's way to my hair, her blunt nails lightly scarping against my head in a soothing rhythm.

"Can I talk to you about something?" I sigh and nod, not moving from my position almost in her lap. "I understand you know. The sudden wave of emotion, the damn bursting, so to speak. I've been there." Her words caused me to sit up a little, to look at her, my eyes full of questions. Her hand comes to rest on my cheek as she makes me look right into her eyes. Looking deeper I can see the flecks of pain, the trials of recovery all reflected within the dark blue depths. She lets me go and I look down, taking hold of her hand and giving it a squeeze I lean back into her ready to listen.

"I was 9. The girls in my class. I was the new kid and the 'queen bee' took a disliking to me so the others all followed her. My only friend was a little kid called Spencer, he had these huge glasses and he was by far the smartest kid I'd ever met. These girls used to push me around, they'd knock my lunch box out of my hands every morning and stamp my lunch into the playground until it was just crumbs. I lost quite a few pairs of shoes to the school roof and they would flush all my homework down the toilet. I tried to tell my parents but my dad just said it was harmless teasing, that it would stop eventually. And it did. For a little while, it was me and Spencer against the world. We would read and play and do all kinds of things. He's the one who got me into music. But then his mom moved them out to Nevada when I was 11.

"I was alone again and these girls had had a long time to think of new cruel things to do to me. They started stealing my lunch money. Posting nasty notes on my locker, one time they cut holes in my gym kit so I had to explain to the teacher why I couldn't participate in her lesson. It was petty little things like that but it made me dread waking up in the morning and going to school. It was my first year in high school when it took a turn for the worse. I opened my locker one morning and all the rotten food from the garbage fell out on top of me. There was an envelope stuck to the inside of the door with a razor in it and the words 'just do us all a favour'. I could hear people laughing at the kid covered in trash, there were no teachers around so nobody would help. A few looked sympathetic but they wouldn't do anything for fear of it happening to them. I was like a leper. If anyone spoke to me they were exiled until they'd done something horrible to rectify the fact they were nice to me. I was isolated in a school full of kids. I stopped eating, I just couldn't find the appetite. They used to follow me home from school, throwing stones at me or walking next to me and pinching me, hitting me. It was hell. I would get panic attacks if my parents made any sudden loud noises or moved too fast. It was my gym teacher who noticed. She saw how my kit had started to hang off me and reported it to the counsellor, who then informed my parents. I spent months refusing to talk to anybody.

"My mom hired a shrink but I wouldn't say a word in any of the sessions. One day she called me out on it. She asked me about how what I was doing was affecting those around me, how my parents relationship was. I was 14 and thought that I was making them get a divorce. I know now that it wasn't me but back then I honestly believed it was all my fault. She burst my damn. Everything that I'd been holding in about these girls and everything they'd done to me and how nobody believed me when I was little all came crashing out and I cried. I cried and I couldn't stop. She had to cancel the appointment after mine because she'd made this breakthrough and she wanted me to know she wasn't giving up on me. She knew I felt like I was alone. She told me that she'd had a hard time in school too, associated with me, made me feel like I wasn't by myself. She just sat there and let me cry on her shoulder. She's one of my mother's closest friends now. She helped her to understand where I was and how she could help me. She still calls occasionally to check up on me, see how I'm doing. What I'm trying to say is I broke but I let her help me pick up the pieces. I let her hold me together whilst my mom found the glue. My dad still left but I was okay, I had people there to help me through it. Let me hold you together Sarah. Aubrey will be your glue, she's desperate to help she just doesn't know how. You have three women here that are dying to help you, to let you know you're safe, to get you through this. None of us are going anywhere."

I don't know when I'd started crying again, but my tears were falling from my cheeks into Beca's shirt. I could feel hers falling onto my shoulders. She was right. I was broken. I had shattered and my emotions were all over the place. But she was there. I'm still mad at Bree and Chloe for reading my journal but I know they did it in order to try and understand me not out of nosiness. I nodded my head and let Beca hold me even tighter to her chest. I felt her kiss the top of my head before brushing my hair behind my ear.

"Are you ready to go down or do you want to stay here a little longer?" I looked up at her, she looked a little pale and both of our hands were shaking, her lips were quivering, no doubt mine were too. I nodded and started to stand, Beca helping me up, walking me over to the fire escape and back down to our window. The warmth stung as it hit my cheeks, my fingers prickling as warmth returned to them. I was startled by Chloe pulling a blanket round my shoulders.

"Sarah, your lips are practically blue! Come in honey, sit down let me make you some nice hot tea." I looked to the side of the living room, seeing the broken mirror had been tidied up. Beca plopped down on the couch next to me, reaching her arm out of her own blanket to pull me back into her side, placing another kiss to my head. I could feel my eyes starting to close, the sudden flood of warmth making me feel drained and lethargic. Chloe helped me to sit up and drink half of the tea she'd brought in for me before she would even consider allowing me to fall asleep. She pulled me to her and started singing. I couldn't understand the words, I was too tired and they all seamed to leach into each other. I did hear another voice joining in, harmonising perfectly. With one beautiful voice on either side of me I fell into the dark abyss of exhaustion.

 **AN: SOOOOOOO we now know what happened to Beca, and we've had Sarah's little breakdown. I don't quite know where to go next but I'll think of something before next Wednesday. There, I'm giving myself a due date. Next Wednesday there will be a new chapter... Please review and let me know what you thought :) xx**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: okay, so I know I missed the Wednesday deadline I gave myself but I'm updating now so... it's better than waiting a month right? I had a few great reviews for the last chapter so thank you for that :) it really makes me smile when I see people are enjoying my work :)**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own Pitch Perfect or any of the original Characters but Sarah and the plot are all mine :)**

 **Chapter 11**

Three women stood watching as Sarah rolled and groaned in her sleep. Her hand had been cleaned and bandaged by Chloe and a thick blanket and hot water bottle had warmed her up. But now they were stuck watching as the teen had what seemed to be a horrific nightmare. Her skinny legs were twisted in the blankets, desperately fighting to free themselves, her hands clenched so tight Aubrey thought her nails would break the skin on her palms, tears leaked slowly, steadily from the corners of her eyes, her sweaty hair sticking to her forehead. They were helpless, there was nothing they could do. As soon as any of them even approached the bed she would scream, curling in on herself as if waiting to be struck or beaten. It broke their hearts, all three of them vowing to do anything possible to help the girl in the bed... by any means necessary.

**************************** **MR POSEN POV**************************************

The glass slammed against the little tray in front of me, scotch sloshing over my hand. The rage I had managed to quell was crawling its way back in, tendrils of white hot anger invading my thoughts. How dare she? After everything we gave to her, she just thinks she can just leave? Well she's in for a surprise, stupid girl won't know what's hit her... literally. Imagining it calms me down a little, all the different ways I can punish this little stunt. Lets see how she feels after 3 days in the basement. That seems to be her least favourite, the thing that scares her most, the cold and the darkness, lack of food and only salt water cause delirium and hallucinations making it even worse. Maybe I should make it 5 days this time, drag her to hell and back, after all she's had it easy for the last month.

"Sir if you wouldn't mind putting your seat in the upright position, we're going to be landing soon. Thank you." I force a smile as the Flight attendant takes my glass and makes sure everything is in order. I need to start thinking this through, I'm less than 45 minutes away from my dear daughters now and I need to be able to confront them without flying off the handle.

I remember Rich saying Chloe pulled 20 hour shifts for her residency and that other girl, Bella? Was a DJ at a club so she won't be around nights. Perfect time to head in then. Wait for little Chloe to leave, wouldn't want her squealing to daddy then after the DJ is gone we'll have a good few hours for "family time". I think if there was a mirror in front of me right now my smile would scare even me. See you soon girls...

*************************************** **SPOV** **********************************

I'm shaking. I can feel it. My shoulders are jerking around completely out of my control. My legs are cramping, the palm of my Left hand stings, the fingers stiff from being clenched so long. My eyes are sticky and swollen from crying so hard before I fell asleep but I manage to open them, being greeted by the cool blue of Chloe's eyes. I move to rub the sleep dust only to see the bandage on my right hand covering my knuckles.

"I cleaned it up for you, there was still some mirror in there and we didn't want it getting infected. I'm sorry. I know you don't like to be touched when you're not aware of it." Nodding I roll onto my side, facing away from the redhead and climb out of the bed. I feel my cheeks blush at what I'm wearing. They've left me in my t-shirt but changed my jeans for shorts, leaving my legs completely bare. Every scar, every blemish visible for scrutiny. Clenching my jaw I turn to see the sadness in Chloe's normally bright eyes.

"'n sorry. I'll change. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." As I move to the wardrobe I hear her choke back her tears and approach me.

"No. You didn't make me sad. Don't ever apologise for anything he's done to you Sarah. None of this was your fault." She reaches out and holds up my arm to show off some of my scars trying to prove her point. The words go over my head, I know they're not true but I nod, giving her what she wants.

"No Sarah, listen to me. Why is it your fault? What did you do to deserve this one?" She points to a circular burn on the inside of my elbow. I screw my eyes shut, the memory surfacing, replaying through my head.

" _Maybe next time you'll remember to be more careful."_

" _I'm sorry Daddy, I didn't mean to. I was only looking at it. I miss him, I just wanted to see. I won't do it again. I'll remember." I fell to the floor before I felt the slap to my cheek. A fiery pain erupted from behind my eye socket, fat tears rolling down my seven year old face. I was only looking at my dad's photograph of Mikey, but he'd come in and startled me so I dropped it. The frame had smashed ruining the picture and making a mess in his office. He'd forced me to pick up every tiny piece of glass on my hands and knees before making me stand in front of him for my punishment. Aubrey had been banished upstairs for trying to step in and protect me. I flinched at the sound of his zippo lighting, watched him hold it to the end of the cigarette before taking a drag, breathing it into my face causing me to choke. He held out his hand waiting for my hand, when I took to long he grabbed it and pressed the ghastly cigarette into my elbow before I could even blink. I screamed until my throat was raw. The smell of burning flesh mixing with stale cigarettes making me gag._

"I broke his favourite picture of Mikey. I shouldn't have been in his office. I shouldn't have touched it. _I_ broke it Chloe. Nobody else, _Me_." She looked stunned, teas swimming in her eyes.

"How old were you?" I shrugged, knowing my answer would just make her angry, cause the damn to break, make tears break the barriers and fall down her face. "Tell me Sarah. How old? 4? 5?" I shake my head no.

"I was old enough to know better" I flinch as her hand reaches out and guides my chin until I'm looking into her watery eyes."

"How. Old."

"Seven. I was seven." She closes her eyes and two tears drip down her cheeks as she lets out a shaky breath.

"You were still practically a baby Sarah. How could it have been your fault. Yes he was Michael's son but he was your big brother, your hero. You missed him, he never came home and you didn't understand. You never got to say goodbye. Any parent who begrudges their child the chance to grieve is not a good one. Please Sarah, you have to understand, this is not your fault. He chose to do this. You didn't make him, you didn't deserve it, there are no excuses." I'm suddenly pulled into her chest, her arms wrapped tightly around me. My arms slowly make there way around her waist, returning the hug, my hands grabbing fistfuls of her shirt, holding her to me. Pulling back I realise I've left a small wet patch on the front of her work scrubs. She tells me it's fine and kisses my head before leading into the lounge where Aubrey sits cross legged, holding a cup of tea. She smiles when we walk in, leans up to kiss Chloe goodbye then pats the seat next to her.

Perching on the couch, I can't look at her. I'm so ashamed of how I spoke to her earlier. The realisation that in that moment I was no better than him, that I'd let my anger get the best of me and lashed out was like a collar choking me. I feel the couch dip as she moves closer and places her hand over mine to stop my fingers fiddling with the bandage covering my knuckles.

"It's not your fault. You know that right? I made you cross, I aggravated you and went too far. You're nothing like him." The sobs escape before I can stop them as she pulls me to her, her fingers running through my hair.

"I lashed out. I broke the mirror."

"Exactly. You broke the _mirror._ When was the last time he refrained from hurting you and punched a wall instead? You could easily have slapped me, God knows I was asking for it, but you didn't, you punched a mirror instead."

We sat like that on the sofa for a while before My stomach grumbled alerting both Aubrey and I to the fact it wanted feeding. She chuckled as she picked up her cell phone.

"What do you say we order a pizza? Beca's at the club, Chlo's at work and I can't be bothered to cook. We can relax in front of the TV and watch the Aristocats. I know it's your favourite, Chlo's still got it somewhere." I smile and nod, getting up to get a drink as she calls the pizza place and hunts Chloe's room for the DVD. We're at the part where Thomas O'Mally is learning to swim when the pizza arrives. Tucking into the cheesy, peppery goodness I pay no mind to the fact Aubrey is just picking at her dinner. I was the one who was hungry, she's probably just taken it so I'll feel better about eating.

I'm about to start on my second slice when I look at Bree, seeing tears leaking down her face. I sit up and shuffle over to her, wiping her cheeks with my fingers.

"Bree? What's wrong?" Just as I finish asking the power goes out. I've never been fond of the dark, so when a hand grabs hold of my arm I cant help the yelp that escapes me. I flinch at the feel of someone breathing on my ear before Bree whispers.

"Relax, it's me. Stay quiet. You know where the secret cupboard is in my closet right? Behind the Bella uniforms and Chloe's surf board? Nod yes if you do." I nod. "I need you to go and hide there. Don't make any noise okay? I'll explain why later. Sarah it's really important that you don't make any noise and be quick. Go. Now." she gives me a little push at the small of my back to get me moving. I'm scared. Bree acting strange paired with the sudden darkness means something is happening. Something bad. I turn back to look but she's already moved from the couch and my eyes aren't used to the dark enough to find her.

"Go Sarah." She hisses. I make my way quietly to the hallway, edging along the wall past Beca's room, keep going down to Aubrey's door. Thankfully it's already open so I don't have to worry about it creaking. Still pressed to the wall I make my way towards the closet. I can hear Aubrey in the kitchen, she's making noise. I know she's disguising any noises I might make. I can feel my breaths getting faster and harder, the panic at not knowing is creeping in. Something bad is going to happen and she's trying to save me from it, but I don't know what _it_ is. I move the Bella outfits, sliding behind the surfboard, trying desperately to be quiet. I wasn't expecting there to be a box there. I didn't know Beca kept her Mix CDs in Bree's closet. I see it in slow motion. My shin hits the box, sending it tumbling into the board, CDs clattering across the floor, surfboard crashing into the door knocking it wide open. I freeze. I hear Aubrey screaming at someone, telling them to stop. Footfalls echoing through the hall getting closer and closer.

I curl in on myself, crouching down, wrapping my arms round my knees, head tucked into my chest, making myself as small as physically possible, praying I won't be seen. I know it won't work, it never does. I don't know when I start rocking back and forth but a rough hand in my hair stops me. He yanks my head back until I'm looking at him, his smile sends shivers through me. Leaning right into my face I can smell the alcohol on his breath.

"Boo."

 **AN: I know, I know. Cruelty to all you readers, what can I say. I'm a mean person... Leave me a review, let me know what you want to happen to them both. Should Beca or Chloe come home or should he torture them and have them find both girls injured?**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: I know it was cruel of me to wait this long to update, I'm sorry, I suddenly found myself knee deep in things that needed doing before I could sit and have five minutes to write :) I had lots of reviews stating what you all wanted to happen next and I have tried to adhere to as many of them as I can, this was incredibly difficult to write and I really didn't realise how twisted I was until I re-read it so, here goes :)**

 ***WARNING: Graphic depictions of violence and abuse of a minor in this chapter, if this offends you then please, please don't read it. You have been warned :(**

 **Chapter 12 – MR P POV**

I sit in the car watching the rain splatter against the wind-shield. The lights are on in their apartment and Chloe left about a half hour ago, I'm just waiting for the opportunity to present itself so I can go in. Considering just buzzing somebody else's doorbell and saying it's a surprise visit, my saviour drives up in the form of a Pizza Delivery guy. I can't believe my luck quickly jogging across the street and catching the door before it can shut. I catch sight of Aubrey's name on top of the delivery notice and stop the guy so I can pay him and take the pizza, telling him my wife was the one who ordered it. He seems pleased to hand it over and not have to navigate all the stairs with the boxes. This is just too easy, they're so close I can almost feel my palms tingling in anticipation of the first slap. Knocking on the door I hold the pizza in front of the peep hole so as Aubrey can't see me. I love the way her face falls when she throws the door open.

My hand flies to her mouth stopping her from screaming and gently guiding her into the apartment I close the door.

"If I hear one noise from you then you'll regret it. Is she here? Nod for yes." I can feel her lips quivering behind my hand as she nods her head.

"If you so much as whisper I'll take it all out on her, do you understand me? She gets punished for your mistakes." Her eyes widen as she nods again and starts to silently sob. I smile, slowly moving my hand from her face and shoving the pizza box at her. I can see her hands shaking as she takes it.

"Where is your fuse box Aubrey Rose?" She points to the hall closet and turns to leave but I grab hold of her wrist. "Not a word, you hear me? She isn't to know I'm here. We wouldn't want to scare her would we..."

*************************************SPOV**************************************

 _I curl in on myself, crouching down, wrapping my arms round my knees, head tucked into my chest, making myself as small as physically possible, praying I won't be seen. I know it won't work, it never does. I don't know when I start rocking back and forth but a rough hand in my hair stops me. He yanks my head back until I'm looking at him, his smile sends shivers through me. Leaning right into my face I can smell the alcohol on his breath._

" _Boo."_

I can still hear Aubrey screaming at him, but it's like I'm underwater. Everything sounds distorted and far away. My eyes tear up, my breathing turning into heaving sobs as he drags me out of the closet by my hair. He's pulling so hard I fall to my hands and knees when he finally lets go. I begin to curl up again, but his boot making contact with my stomach stops me. I hear a slap, but I don't feel it. Thinking he must have hit Aubrey, I look up to check she's okay. What I see stops the dull roaring in my ears immediately. Aubrey stands, her hand still in the air, facing our father who has a red hand print on his cheek. His fists are shaking with rage, his eyes practically on fire, the burning gaze trained on Bree. Her hands shake for an entirely different reason, her eyes shocked, like she can't believe what she's just done.

His fist soars toward her face, like I'm seeing it in slow-motion. I hear the almighty crack as it makes contact, she's unconscious before she even hits the floor. I can't take my eyes off her even though I know he's staring at me. I can feel his glare, hear his boots as he gets closer. I don't even flinch as he grabs my wrist, pulling me so hard I feel my elbow jerk in its socket. My gaze is still focussed on my sister, lying sprawled out on her bedroom floor. A second hard pull on my arm has me screaming in pain, I know the joint is complaining, and so does he. My gaze flicks to his face, seeing the sinister smirk there I quickly avert my eyes, screwing them shut to prepare for what's coming. I feel my arm slacken before he tugs it hard, pulling me to the floor but keeping a hold of my wrist. I hear the sickening pop as my elbow dislocates, my scream echoing around the silent apartment for little more than a second before his hand muffles the sound.

"Sh sh sh little princess. We wouldn't want any nosy neighbours to hear now would we. What would they think of you if they found out? How much would they judge you? Only just got here and already causing such a disturbance. Most of them don't even know your name now why should they care what's happening to you behind closed doors?"

He's right of course. The only neighbour I know is Mrs George from next door and that was only because Beca had asked her to keep an ear out and check on me one afternoon when I was alone for a while. Why should they care what's going on ? For all they know we're just watching a horror movie really loud. I choke back my sobs, nodding my head to let him know I won't make any more noise. I pray that neither Chloe or Beca comes home before he's done. I dread to think what he would do to them if he's interrupted. My train of thought is broken by him pulling me up by my other arm this time, pulling me towards the radiator. He produces a Bella scarf and ties my hand to the heater, the metal scalds my skin when they touch and I hiss in pain as he pulls the knot tight.

Whimpering in fear, I watch him trudge back over to Aubrey, checking she's still out cold. Satisfied that she is he leaves the room, I can hear something clattering in the kitchen but don't even want to think of what it could be. My eyes are trained on Bree, stuck between wanting her to wake up and save us or stay asleep, blissfully unaware of what he's going to do. I don't notice he's back until the chair he's carrying thuds against the floor. He picks Bree up, unceremoniously dropping her into the dining chair and tying her arms to the chair with Beca's braided auxiliary cables then tying one of her Jack leads around Bree's torso rendering her immobile for when she comes round.

"Now, we wait, little princess. Because I think your dear sister will want to see this show. She'll want to see what a sorry excuse of a human being you are. I bet you didn't tell her how you broke after she left did you? How you did the one thing you promised never to do. How you would cry yourself to sleep, how you let me do whatever I pleased with you? Did you tell her? Is it a secret? Huh little princess? Does she know how her precious baby sister would bend to my will without so much as a whimper of protest? How you did whatever I told you too, how you would get on your knees and worship me? Does she know what you did princess?"

I know he's trying to get a rise out of me, I know he's winding me up. But I can't help it, it works. And he knows it does. No matter how tightly I screw my eyes shut I can still hear his horrible rumbling voice, speaking the words that taunt me, words of my nightmares. And he won't stop. Not until I give him what he wants. He said he would wait but he doesn't have the patience. He's goading me into reacting so he can punish me. He wants to hurt me. I can still hear him. His words that hurt almost as much as his fists, biting into my mind, shattering the carefully constructed walls.

"STOP IT! STOP CALLING ME THAT! STOP IT! Please just stop.."

I can't look at him. I know what I'll see, the triumphant smirk, the mirth and anger flickering in his eyes. He won this round, he got what he wanted.

"What did you just say to me? Look at me."

I screw my eyes shut even tighter, refusing to give in to his orders. Desperate to prove his taunting words wrong. I hear him as he moves, feel his breath on my face as he stands right in front of me. Flinching as he grabs my chin and forces me to face him,

"Look at me." I keep my eyes closed, although I'm shaking now. I will not give in. His grip gets even tighter and he jerks my head in his grip causing me to almost fall.

"I SAID LOOK AT ME!" I cough out a sob, screwing my eyes tighter still. I don't know where this defiance has come from and I can't decide whether it's brave or stupid. I'm surprised when he lets go and I hear him move away. I want to open my eyes, to see what he's doing but then he wins. The fear that plagues me doubles when I hear a slap. My eyes shoot open but he's not even facing me anymore. He's bent over Aubrey slapping her face, causing her to stir and come round.

"Don't! Please! I'm looking! Please! Please don't!" He moves so that I can see Aubrey, holding her chin, forcing her to look at me as he slaps her again.

"This was your choice little princess. You wanted to do it the hard way. Maybe you'll learn by your mistakes."

His leg comes back and he kicks the chair causing it to fall. The crash as it hits the floor is almost deafening. It jolts Bree awake and knocks the wind out of her simultaneously. She struggles as he picks up the chair again. My scared eyes meet her green ones, pleading with her to go along with anything he says.

"So nice of you to join us again Aubrey Rose. Did you have a nice sleep?" He strokes his knuckles down her cheek, smiling at the way she flinches away from him.

"Now that you're awake, how about we play a little game hmm? Yes? Here are the rules, every time you disobey me or do something I don't like, I'm going to punish your sister. Every time you answer back or scream, I'm going to punish her. Do you understand the rules?" She doesn't respond. It's clearly not what he wants because he leaves the room, coming back with a packet of cigarettes. He lights one and comes to stand next to me, looking at Bree.

"Aubrey Rose, I asked if you understood the rules?" Her tears run down her cheeks but still she doesn't respond. He pulls the collar of my shirt aside so he can see my collar bone.

"You have one last chance Aubrey Rose. Do. You. Understand." He's moved the cigarette close enough that I can feel the heat coming off the end. I whimper and plead as he holds me still, his muscled thigh holding me against the radiator, one arm holding me still the other bringing the offending object closer and closer, it barely grazes my skin as a sob.

"YES! YES I UNDERSTAND! LET HER GO! PLEASE!" he laughs and presses the cigarette into the base of my neck. I try not to scream, I really do but it fights its way out. Tears stream down my face, stinging when they make contact with the tiny circular burn.

"Maybe next time you'll answer me quicker Aubrey Rose." I feel him grab my chin, forcing me to look at her through my tears. His tone is low and menacing causing me to shiver as he speaks to her.

"You did this Aubrey Rose. Look at what you did to her." I try to shake my head but he's holding it still. I feel him start to untie the scarf around my wrist only to throw me over his shoulder and carry me to the bed. Throwing me down he pulls my good arm to the headboard, tying it there before I can even flinch away.

"Now lets hope you've learned your lesson. Aubrey, I'm going to let you out. If you run, I'll use this on her" I lift my head to see him holding his belt buckle and can't suppress the shudder that overtakes my body. "If you scream I'll use this on her, If you try to free her she'll get it twice as bad. Do you understand?" She must have nodded because I can hear shuffling and the sound of cables hitting the floor.

"Now, go and kneel next to your sister on the bed." I hear her move and the bed dip to my left as she kneels there. "Good girl, now why don't you show Sarah how much you love her."

I see Aubrey frown at his request. She wasn't around when he started 'showing me his love'. Her confusion is clear so he leans over to show her. I shrink back as much as I can, trying to get away as his breath fans across my face. His strong fingers grip my chin keeping me still as he leans in, his rough chapped lips landing on top of mine. His tongue licks across my bottom lip but I refuse to open my mouth to him. I can hear Aubrey sobbing next to me as he finally gets back up.

"Now, Show Sarah how much you love her Aubrey Rose." I see her shake her head, unable to speak after what she just witnessed. "Aubrey have you forgotten the rules already?" She leans down so fast our noses bump together as she kisses me. It's not as bad when she does it but it still feels wrong. I hate him more now than I ever have before. I see him adjust his trousers out of the corner of my eye and it makes me want to gag. His smile is sickening.

"Well done. Wasn't that nice Sarah? You see how your sister loves you? Why don't you say Thank you? She has been looking after you for so long now, she deserves a little reward." I choke on my sobs, trying not to cry for Aubrey. I'm shaking all over now, struggling to make my voice work.

"Thank-you Bree. Thank you for letting me stay, and thank you for loving me so much. I'm so glad I'm here. How can I ever repay you." The words are monotone, like I'm reading from a script. Exactly how I've been trained to say them.

"What do you think Aubrey? What should we have her do? If we were at home I would have her play for me but you don't have a piano. I do love hearing her play for hours, she plays to me while I work, don't you Sarah?"

I nod as his hand strokes my face. I remember the last time I 'played'. He tied my ankle to the piano bench and told me if I stopped playing he would whip me. He made me play for hours on end, windows open, fingers freezing and stiff, falling asleep at the bench. It was horrible. I used to love playing but I hadn't touched my piano since then.

"I know. Aubrey, wouldn't you love to see Sarah dance? I brought your shoes with me Sarah. What do you say? A special dance for your sister, for letting you stay here?"

I nod again. He leaves the room, telling Aubrey to untie my hand whilst he fetches my shoes from his bag in the living room. He sits with Bree on the bed whilst I tie them, his eyes are eager and excited, he's never seen me dance. He's taking away the last thing I have. He already took my music, my only escape was when I danced around the empty guest house, but I don't think I'll be doing it again anytime soon. He frowns when I just stand there.

"Why aren't you moving Sarah? Are you not grateful for being allowed to stay here?" I'm quick to nod, trying to stop him getting too angry.

"I was waiting to see if you wanted music sir. A dance looks better with music in the background. Aubrey Might enjoy it more if it has the full effect." I shiver at my words. I hate trying to please him but it's either that or suffer the consequences. His smile is back, making my stomach roll. He stands and walks over to Aubrey's music collection. Picking out a Chopin CD and setting it up to play. I don't have much space to move, but I try my best. I'm amazed at how flexible I still am, even after not dancing for almost a year. He watches me, transfixed for what feels like hours, but in reality is probably only minutes before he stops me.

"Sarah. We can't see you moving properly with that baggy shirt on. Don't you have something more appropriate to wear." I shake my head, I'd only brought a backpack with the essentials with me, and leotards, shorts and sports bras weren't essential. His expression darkens before he grabs my arm and throws me at Aubrey. He grabs my ankles one at a time, smirking at me as I try to struggle, and pulls my shoes off my feet. My struggling turns into kicking, I freeze as I make contact with his leg. I know there wasn't enough power behind it to have actually hurt him but that doesn't matter. I just kicked him and I can see the fury starting to grow in his eyes. His hands twitch, as if he wants to hit me but thinks better of it. He undoes his belt, pulling it through the loops on his trousers with a swish then holding the buckle end and flicking making the leather crack. Both Aubrey and I flinch at the sound.

I feel him grab my calf and roll me over, I hear the crack of the leather before I feel it. Like a flame lighting up the back of my thighs, I wish Chloe had put Trousers on me rather than shorts. I can hear Aubrey sobbing but she doesn't move. Only her hand stroking through my hair lets me know she's sorry. None of this is her fault. I should never have run away. I made him this angry, not her. Another crack has me sobbing into Bree's legs. My thighs are on fire, he stops to rub his hands over them, I choke down my cry of pain. I daren't move for fear of what he'd do to Aubrey if I disobeyed him. I feel his fingers slide my shirt up my back, grabbing the waistband of my shorts and pulling them down to reveal my panties underneath. I hear Aubrey gasp but this is nothing new to me. I'm ashamed that she's seeing me like this, I never wanted anyone to know. His hand moves to the middle of my back holding me still as he brings the buckle down on the very tops of my thighs just before the line of my underwear. I cry out, the wetness on my leg alerts me to the fact he's broken the skin.

"Keep her quiet. If she makes one more noise it's going to get worse. The last thing we need is nosy neighbours right now Aubrey Rose." I feel her shaking hands stroke down my face, coming to rest over my mouth holding in my cries and sobs. I know she's doing this for my benefit but I can't help the tiny niggling feeling of betrayal that rises up inside me. I know I would do the same to her if it meant saving her from any pain, but I'm in too much pain myself to be rational at the moment. He brings the belt down again, stopping to slick his hands through the droplets of blood on my leg, wiping them off on my cheek.

"Count Aubrey Rose." I hear her sob and count as the blows continue to rain down on my sore legs and back. I lose track after six, my brain too foggy to keep up anymore. When he finally stops he rolls me over, pressing me down into the mattress and straddling my waist. He jerks my dislocated arm making me scream into Aubrey's hand and I welcome the black dots that invade my vision, slowly taking me over, relieving some of the pain. I'm aware of being carried somewhere and put down on something cold and hard. A sudden jet of freezing cold water chases away the blackness I was waiting to take me. I splutter as it burns my airways when I accidentally breathe it in.

"That's a good little princess, stay awake for daddy." He lifts me out of the tub onto the bathroom floor stroking my hair, holding me to his chest. This is another of his games. He likes to play Daddy, he likes me to act like a little girl for him to comfort and he'll make me feel all better. The caring touches and fake comfort is almost worse than when he's hitting me, but still I play along. I hope if I play along it won't hurt as bad, I can keep him from losing his temper again and Aubrey can phone the police or Beca or Chloe. Anybody, I just want somebody to save me from his torment.

"Don't cry princess. Daddy's got you, you're safe now. Lets go and get you changed out of these wet things before you catch your death of cold, hey?" He carries me to Beca's room and rummages for something I can wear. I can't help but wonder where Aubrey is, but I don't ask for fear of making him angry. He turns holding another shirt and underwear.

"There we go princess. Lift your arms for daddy, Good girl. Carefully now, we don't want to hurt you more." I lift my left arm letting him take off my shirt over my head then maneuver it over my right arm leaving me in just underwear. He guides the new shirt over my arm and head letting it fall before slipping his fingers into the elastic of my panties and sliding them off under the cover of the shirt. He crouches down helping me step into the fresh ones and pulls them up for me. I'm trying desperately not to cry and scream. I hate myself for letting him do this.

"Wh-what are you doing?" I can't look up at Aubrey standing in the doorway. I can hear the shock in her voice and can't bear to see the shame that will be in her eyes. "Sarah? What's he doing?"

"Be quiet Aubrey Rose. Can't you see you're upsetting your baby sister." I can't hold back my sobs anymore, they claw their way out of my chest, I'm shaking so much I think I would fall if he wasn't holding me to his chest. One hand starts to run through my hair, the other rubbing small circles on my back, successfully holding me to him so I can't escape.

"Please tell me you didn't... You didn't touch her! Sarah, please tell me he didn't!"

"THAT'S ENOUGH AUBREY ROSE! IF YOU CAN'T HOLD YOUR TONGUE THEN I WILL TEACH YOU HOW!" Her face goes white and her teeth click with the speed her mouth closes. "Now, come in here and sit down. My little princess is tired and she needs to go to bed but I want to keep an eye on you." Her confusion at the nickname he uses is clear but she does as she's told. He leads me to the bed, pulling back the covers then tucking me in on my front so as not to hurt my legs. Pulling the quilt over me he tucks me in then sits next to me on the double bed and starts to pat my bottom, like you would to calm a baby. It's humiliating having Aubrey see me like this but the fight has gone out of me, it's been squashed by the feeling of self-preservation.

He starts to sing, much as I hate to admit it, both Aubrey and I got our ability to sing from our father. His low dulcet tones used to lull us into the deepest of sleeps before this all started, before Mikey died. It seems that he never lost the ability because before I can stop myself, I'm yawning and my eyes are closing, my eyelids feel heavy as lead. I can faintly hear Bree sobbing, but can't find it in myself to care. I'm suddenly at peace, Four years old again falling asleep with my daddy singing me a lullaby, My mind has reverted in order to keep me safe. I welcome sleep as it beckons me into it's clutches, freeing me from this hell, at least for a little while...

***************************APOV****************************************************

I walk up to see my father helping Sarah into a pair of panties. My mind immediately flies to the worst case scenario, I cannot believe he would touch her like that. But what surprises me more is the glaze over her eyes. He's murmuring things to her, holding her like he wants to comfort her, she's stiff as a board, alerting me to the fact she's severely uncomfortable with the position, but it confuses me.

"Wh-what are you doing?" She won't look at me but I see her cheeks flush faintly with embarrassment. "Sarah? what's he doing?"

His rage filled eyes flick to my face, his cheeks turning pink with Anger. "Be quiet Aubrey Rose. Can't you see you're upsetting your baby sister?" I'm shocked by what he says. I can hear her gut wrenching sobs from where I stand across the room, she's slowly losing her grip on reality and it's all his fault. She's retreating into herself, letting panic take over. I can only think of one thing that would make her this fragile, this scattered.

"Please tell me you didn't... You didn't touch her! Sarah, please tell me he didn't!" I can't keep the tears from falling down my face. If he laid so much as a finger on her I'll kill him. I see him clutch her to his chest tighter, rubbing circles on her back and mock comforting her.

"THAT'S ENOUGH AUBREY ROSE! IF YOU CAN'T KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT THEN I WILL TEACH YOU HOW!" I shut my mouth so fast my teeth bash together but the ache barely registers as I watch him coo in her ears. "Now, come in here and sit down. My little princess is tired and she needs to go to bed but I want to keep an eye on you." My eyes widen as I make my way over to Beca's desk chair. He hasn't called her Princess since she was about three years old. He was always telling her that was what her name meant, she was his miracle, his princess that's why he named her Sarah. He's talking about her like she's still that little baby, treating her like a child. His demeanour completely changes as he walks her to the bed and tucks her in. I watch with narrowed, suspicious eyes as he sits next to her, but his actions genuinely shock me. He starts to treat her as one would a tiny baby, patting her and singing to her. It's been years since I have heard him sing, I had forgotten that he could. I can't hold back my own sobs any longer. Seeing my sister being treated this way and not knowing what to do or how to help. It's demeaning for her to be seen like this, it's not easy to watch either but the fact that she knows how to play along, how to keep him happy makes me wander how long he's been treating her this way. How long she's been like this.

I can't watch any longer, turning away only to see the flashing red lights of Beca's alarm clock, 2:15am. Beca's shift changed fifteen minutes ago, she should be home any minute. I hope she got my text, I really hope she doesn't come here without somebody to help her deal with all this, she can hold her own but dad is huge and she's just so little. I couldn't bear for her to be hurt too. I'm not particularly religious but in that moment I pray. To any God who will listen, I pray for Sarah, I pray that justice will be served, I pray to be found, to be saved from this hell of a night. I just hope that somebody... anybody up there is listening...

 **AN: so as I said at the start I found this really difficult to write which is why I'm being mean and splitting it into two chapters instead of all at once (plus this is the longest chapter I've updated anyway and I didn't want to spoil you too much :P) Leave a review and let me know what you think. Did I take It too far?... I have a nasty habit of doing that sometimes... I can tone it back if you guys want just let me know :) UNTIL NEXT TIME!**


	13. Chapter 13

**AN: I know this has been a long time coming but things just get on top of me sometimes. Hopefully this is nearly done and the next few updates won't be too far apart. I really am so sorry...**

 **Chapter 13 BPOV**

I look down at my phone, 1:55. One more set then it's time to sign off and set a standard playlist for the last hour of club life. To be perfectly honest I'm surprised how many people actually stay out this long, I would give anything to be at home in my bed with my girls. The vibrating of my phone alerts me to an incoming text, deciding to wait until I finish to look I set up the playlist on the club's computer before packing up my laptop and USBs ready to leave. Remembering I have a text I take out my phone. _Two unread messages from Aubrey? What is she still doing up?_ I open them and barely manage to keep my grip on my phone. My first instinct is to call the police but what am I supposed to tell them? I think there's something wrong at my house because my girlfriend sent me a weird text? As if they'll go for that. My next idea is to call Chloe but she still has 4 hours left of her shift. Shit! I decide to go with instinct and dial 911.

"911 what is your emergency"

"Hi, my girlfriend just texted me and told me not to go home alone that it's dangerous. I think there's something wrong at the house?"

"I can't help you with relationship advice honey If you're done with your little prank then-"

"No wait! Something's wrong. She's at home with her 17 year old sister who recently ran away from their abusive dad. Something's wrong. Please I need someone to check it out I'm still at work twenty minutes away. Please."

"Alright miss an officer has been dispatched to your current address."

"NOO I'm not home, I need it to go to my address, my house, not here. 3645 Habersham road Apartment 4D."

"Okay and officer has been dispatched to that address. Do you need to stay on the line until the officers make it to you?"

"I don't need officers, I can drive myself home. Please just make sure- ugh never mind. Thank you." Hanging up the phone I run to my car and prepare to break a few laws so I can get home as fast as humanly possible, letting out a silent prayer that my little dysfunctional family is okay...

****************************************APOV**********************************

I couldn't help the tears that were leaking down my face watching him be so tender and loving with her was disturbing. I knew my father was bad, he had a temper, a mean streak, but I don't recognise this man. He is certifiably insane. Seeing him tuck the loose hair behind Sarah's ear, sing her a lullaby and comb his fingers through her hair until she was asleep, it would have been a touching moment between father and daughter under any other circumstance. But it wasn't any other circumstance. The red flashing numbers of the alarm clock are mocking me, changing extra slowly, 2:18. Come on Beca. Please, please have sent someone.

Just as the thought crosses my mind I hear the door crash. My dad's flash to me before looking down at Sarah again then pushing himself from the bed and running out of the room. As soon as he's gone I run to my sister, waking her up. One of her eyes has swollen shut and she winces when she hears the voices in the other room. We both scream at a loud crash, Sarah breaking down in sobs. I want desperately to go out there and see what is happening, to watch my father being taken down, to show Sarah that she'll be safe, but I can't bring myself away from her broken body. I lean down to kiss her head, pulling her closer as two people race through the door and approach the bed. They manage to separate us both, they're trying to speak to me but all I can hear is Sarah screaming for me. They keep sitting me down, pulling my face to them, trying to help me before eventually giving up and letting me go to her. I think her fingers leave bruises with how tight she grabs my arms but I don't mind. The pain means she's here, means she's alive. It's like we're in a bubble, they keep trying to see to us but we don't hear what they're saying. I don't even realise I'm shaking until one of them pulls me to the bed to sit down and stop me collapsing. The dots in my vision get larger and larger until they completely take over and I pass out.

*********************************BPOV*****************************************

The flashing lights of police cars greet me at the entrance to our apartment building. Officers escorting a big man in handcuffs out of the door is all I need before I'm practically flying across the street to the door and up the stairs. I need to see what he's done. I stop on the third floor seeing paramedics carrying an unconscious Aubrey on a gurney. Her face has a huge bruise and she's slightly shaking. I can't old in the tears at the sight of my girlfriend. I'm only pulled out of my little moment by the sounds of screaming. Pure terror filled screams coming from our floor. I know it's Sarah, she sounds terrified. I plough through the officers and residents ignoring the calls following behind me. All I can think about is getting to that little girl. She needs me. What I see breaks my heart. A paramedic holding her whilst the other tries to calm her down but she just keeps screaming and fighting, her face covered in tears, eyes wild. I do the only thing I can think of, holding her face and turning her to face me, looking into those Terrified eyes. I see the exact moment she recognises me and catch her as she sags into me. I bring her close to me, as if trying to convince myself she's okay, she'll be fine, we'll get through this. My phone is buzzing in my pocket but I don't care, all that matters right now is Sarah.

"Miss, we need to take her in. she needs immediate medical attention. We took her sister down to the first ambulance already. You can accompany her but we need to get her out and examine the full extent of her injuries."

I nod and look at Sarah's face, her eyes screwed shut, fistfuls of my shirt held in her tight death grip.

"Okay Sarah? I need you to tell me where it hurts so the paramedics can help ans we can get you safely to the hospital." I know she must be in immense pain when she doesn't even protest to the hospital, just nods and doesn't speak so I try again.

"Sarah, where does it hurt most? I need you to speak to me." I feel her move a little and just about hear her whisper "Everywhere" and it makes me want to cry and scream and break down. When the paramedics explain check her over and give me the list of injuries they've seen I just want to take her away from everything and keep her safe. I can't watch them attach all the wires and tubes to her tiny little body. My phone rings as they're putting it in the ambulance and I look to see Chloe's face smiling up at me. I know I have to answer.

"Hi, Chlo can I talk-"

"BECA WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON! THEY JUST BROUGHT AUBREY INTO THE ER! WHERE'S SARAH?!" I take a deep breath before answering.

"It's bad Chloe. Their dad was here. Aubrey was being taken to an ambulance when I got here and Sarah was upstairs, screaming. It's bad Chlo. We're coming in now. See you in about ten minutes okay? I need to go." She says okay and I hang up before climbing in the back and grabbing Sarah's hand...

*******************************SPOV********************************************

I wake up to Aubrey shaking me and loud voices shouting in the other room, things crashing and breaking. I don't know exactly what's happening, I don't know where dad is or who else is here but Aubrey is with me. I can't seem to get close enough to her, I almost wish I could completely melt into her and be 100% safe. I don't realise there are other people in the room until Aubrey is being pried away from me and hands are trying to turn me over. I don't register what they're saying all I can do is scream for my sister, scream and fight. My arms fly and my fists make contact with people's arms and faces, my feet kick out when they try to get me to calm down. Why are they touching me? What are they trying to do? I can't breathe, can't they see I can't breathe? After what seems like hours I feel Aubrey's cold hands take hold of my hands and I grab on, I don't even care how hard I'm holding on, she can't leave me again, I need her right now. I feel her start to shake her eyes rolling a little in their sockets, one of the voices in the room says something about shock before they pull us apart again, she sits down before she suddenly falls back and her shaking gets worse. I try to get to her but I'm being held back, screaming and kicking and crying, she needs me, can't they see she needs me. One of he people gets a needle out of his bag and sticks it in her arm slowing her tremors, there are lots of words being shouted that I don't understand or don't hear over my own screaming. I'm exhausted and my body hasn't been properly fed in a couple of days so all this screaming and fighting is tiring me out but I need to be with Aubrey. Why are they keeping us apart. I don't understand.

I feel two small hands on either side of my face, turning me to look into dark blue pools full of concern and fear. Beca. The Paramedic lets go and I fall into her embrace, sobbing and crying. My body hurts, my vision sightly spinning but I don't care, Beca's here. I'm safe again. Beca's here. She came. She saved us. Beca came for me. Closing my eyes the roaring in my ears dulls to a slow whistle and I can slightly hear her talking to someone.

"Miss we need to take her in. She needs immediate medical attention. We took her sister down to the first ambulance you can accompany her but we need to get her out and examine the full extent of her injuries."

"Okay. Sarah?" I nod "I need you to tell me where it hurts so that the paramedics know how to help and we can get you safely to the hospital." I nod again but don't say anything.

"Sarah where does it hurt most? I need you to speak to me."

I nod again and sniffle before turning my face so my mouth is next to Beca's ear, whispering seems about all I can manage right now.

"Everywhere. My legs and my arm. My back, my chest. My head, my voice hurts."

I feel her hands sweeping the hair out of my face as she starts to rock me a little repeating everything I say to the paramedic. I can feel his gloved hands feeling over all the areas I said, when he reaches my arm I can't hold in my scream.

"The elbow is dislocated, minor burns to the wrist and base of her neck, breathing sounds irregular and slightly rattling like a drowning patient would, possible broken ribs, definite severe bruising to the face and torso. Are you okay to help me get her onto the chair and down to the ambulance?" Beca must have nodded because next thing I know I'm being lifted and crying openly as they load me onto their fold out gurney thing. The ride goes quickly, Beca's thumb rubbing circles into my wrist keeps me grounded. The first thing I see coming out of the ambulance is the worried face of Aubrey's red-headed girlfriend. I can see the tear tracks on her face, her hands floating over me but not touching me. I try to smile but I can't quite get my face to use the right muscles. She sobs as she grabs a part of the bed helping to push me in. I feel Them both kiss me on the head before I'm wheeled through some doors and they stay behind. The last thing I hear is Beca starting to sob into Chloe...

 **AN: I know it's not the best chapter ever and I'm sorry. I'm not very good at medical stuff so I'm going to skip the check ups and just go straight to the visiting next chapter so I don't get too much wrong. Please review, I really like seeing your feedback and what you thought. It helps me think of what to do next :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: Sooooooo Hey guys... I know, I'm terrible, it has literally been a year since I last updated this story. I've had a few reviews recently asking for more. TBH I'm surprised people are still reading it so, on with the story :)**

 **Chapter 14**

 **APOV**

It's raining. Not torrential downpour rain, but that misty kind. The stuff that sort of sticks to you and makes you soaking wet. I am soaked, but I'm not cold. The rain is warm.

"What are you doing Aubrey?" Startled by the voice I turn to see it's owner standing right behind me, then I know, I'm dreaming.

"Mike?" I smile. He doesn't.

"What are you doing here? Why are you here? Aren't you even trying?" I feel the smile fall from my face. He's not happy to see me. I don't know what it is I've done but somehow I've made him upset with me. His hands grasp my upper arms, shaking me a little to get my attention.

"Aubrey! You have to fight! You can't be here! What about Sarah? What will she do without you? And Chloe? Beca? It's not too late, you have to fight this!" Now I'm confused. I frown at him.

"What are you talking about Mike? Sarah's fine, she's-" I'm cut off by a flash of images in front of my eyes. It's like I'm watching everything He did to us, but from above this time. I can see it all, his rage, the terror, then Paramedics and being rushed off in an ambulance. I see Chloe sobbing as I'm wheeled through the hospital doors, getting her phone out to call Beca. The doctors surrounding me in a small room, all shouting things I don't quite understand. They're attaching me to machines and wires before I'm rushed into an OR. The next thing I see is myself, lying in a bed, Chloe next to me, tears silently running down her cheeks. She's saying something to my sleeping form but it's too muffled for me to hear.

"Mike? What's going on?" I turn to him but I can barely make him out through all the tears in my eyes. A small sob breaks through my chest and before I know it I'm enveloped in his strong arms, dissolving into tears. I can faintly hear him shushing me and rubbing small circles into my back.

"That last picture Bree, That's right now. Dad hit you hard when he knocked you out, then it was made worse when he kicked your chair over. You're brain swelled a little so they had to operate to stop it. You're in a coma. Have been for the last 5 days. Chloe and Beca have been swapping between sitting with you and Sarah. She's doing okay, Bruised and sore but she'll be fine. But you're not supposed to be here with me. You need to fight Bree. She needs you." My head is reeling trying to take in everything he's saying to me. I didn't even realise brains could swell. How do they stop that from happening? How do they wake me up? _Can_ they wake me up?

"I don't understand. Are you saying that I'm dead?" He chuckles mirthlessly.

"No, but you will be if you don't fight. I've got to go, but you need to try Aubrey. Don't give up."

"WAIT! Go Where? How am I supposed to beat this when I don't even know what I'm fighting? Mike!... MIKE!" And Just like that, I'm alone. I look back to the image of me in the bed, Chloe's starting to fall asleep. She looks terrible, Purple bags under her eyes, messy hair. I notice she's still wearing scrubs, she can't be working in this state so they must be her spares from her locker, meaning she hasn't been home in 5 days. If I could just reach out and touch her. Tell her it's going to be okay. I see Beca come and give Chloe a hug then watch Chloe leave to find Sarah before she sits in the chair next to my bed. I see her mouth moving, but like Chloe, I can't quite hear what she's saying. I don't know how long I sit and watch before I can't stomach seeing their pain any further. Every time they swap they look even worse. I sit with my back to them, crying quietly. How can I fight something I can't even see? How can I make this better? Why is it down to me when I'm lying in a hospital full of doctors?

I don't know how long I sit before I hear it. Singing. It's quiet, so very quiet but it's there. A tiny little voice singing one of favourite songs. Echoing around me.

" _Blackbird singing in the dead of night_

 _Take these broken wings and learn to fly._

 _All your life,_

 _You were only waiting for this moment to arise."_

There's a slight warmth on my hand, looking down, I see there's nothing there but I can feel it. I know somebody is holding my hand. I turn and run, I don't know where I'm going but I'm running. Then the image appears next to me again. It's Sarah. Sitting in a wheelchair next to my bed. She's holding my hand. Beca and Chloe stood either side of her crying, watching her speak to me, but it's different this time. I can hear her. I keep running, towards her voice, my hand closes into a fist in an attempt to hold onto the warmth of her hand. Don't give up. I will come back to you...

***********SPOV****************************************************************

"She's holding my hand! Chloe! She's holding my hand! She moved! That's good right?" I look into the tired eyes of my sister's girlfriends. They've had so many moments where they thought she was moving, I can see the disbelief in their eyes. But there's also a spark of hope. They want her to be okay but they don't want to be crushed again. I catch the look Chloe sends Beca, she thinks I'm imagining it.

"Beca, you saw it right? She was holding my hand. She did I swear it. She held my hand." I move my fingers out from under Aubrey's and she groans. "Bree? I told you Chloe!" I smile at my sister, watching her eyes move beneath the lids. "Come on Bree. Wake up... Wake up... Come on." I'm suddenly wheeled out of the way by doctors. I hadn't even noticed Beca and Chloe leave the room but they're both back, tears in their eyes, waiting for the professionals to tell them that I wasn't imagining it. That this time it is real, she's coming back to us. I hear another groan before the doctor starts to speak to Aubrey about breathing tubes and being careful, I'm not really listening to him. All my attention is on her. On my sister, 2 weeks and 6 days and she's finally waking up.

"Sarah?" Hearing her croaky voice Chloe rushes forward and offers her a drink but I still can't see her. There are too many people in the way and I'm still not supposed to walk unsupported. I can feel the tears of frustration building behind my eyes. They didn't even believe me but they all get to see her first? I'm about to shout when a hand on my shoulder stops me. Looking up I see Beca standing behind me, watery eyed with a smile on her face.

"Need a hand?" She waited. I smile back before taking her hand and walking slowly to Aubrey's bed. Seeing her so broken and frail in the big hospital bed is heartbreaking but she's awake. Beca helps me up to sit next to her and she pulls me down into a hug. Before whispering in my ear.

"I heard you singing. I followed your voice back to you." She pulls back stroking her hand down the side of my face, tears in her eyes. "You look like hell kid." I can't stop the laugh that comes from my lips.

"Yeah well, you try living in a hospital for 3 weeks and see how hot you look." Her face falls as soon as I say how long it's been. She frowns before looking to Chloe and Beca. They both nod, when she turns back she pulls my to lie next to her on the bed, her fingers finding their way to my hair, like she's trying to comfort herself as much as comforting me.

I faintly hear the doctor start speaking to the girls but I'm drifting off to the sound of Aubrey's heartbeat. She's okay. I can finally relax and sleep properly.

 **AN: I don't think I like the ending of this chapter but as I currently have a few weeks at home doing nothing, hopefully there will be a few more updates. I know how I want to finish this so next chapter should be about court then maybe an epilogue. But I might change my mind so don't hold me to it :) leave me a review and tell me what you think :)**


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